Subway CEO Apologizes For Trusting Fish Who Falsified Documents To Pass As Tuna

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MILFORD, CT—Addressing recent questions about the integrity of ingredients in one of the chain’s most popular sandwiches, Subway CEO John Chidsey issued a formal apology Thursday for trusting a fish who allegedly submitted false documents to the restaurant in order to pass as a tuna. “Subway has always prided itself…

MILFORD, CT—Addressing recent questions about the integrity of ingredients in one of the chain’s most popular sandwiches, Subway CEO John Chidsey issued a formal apology Thursday for trusting a fish who allegedly submitted false documents to the restaurant in order to pass as a tuna.

“Subway has always prided itself on thoroughly vetting anyone who will represent our brand, but we failed you this time, placing our trust in what turned out to be a common carp,” said Chidsey, adding that while the fish in question went through several rounds of vigorous interviews before it was brought onto the team, its fraudulent credentials claiming membership in thespecies were never questioned.

 

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this is CEO or the real subway we have here to inform in the law u will be charged 5 years for fake subway images

Never trust a fuckin Tuna!

TheDudeInSF Sounds 'fishy' to me! 😆

Haha!

First SUBWAY had a Pedophile as their spokesman and now FAKE Tuna😳... TunaGate

cyrusville 😂😂

cmclymer He looks exactly like a guy to be taken by a carp

Phony Bologna............I mean, tuna.

They were reportedly to have been dismayed at the loss of loyal customers over yet another trust breaking controversy, but the CEO said 'there's plenty of fish in the sea.' The board unanimously ousted him without a thought for uttering that pun.

Probably had fake vax docs from the Internet too.

'After what happened with Jared, I made it clear that I didn't want anything fishy going on in our stores and with our staff. I think maybe the supply team misunderstood and took me a bit too literally.'

5 bucks a foot was an obvious lie.

Same energy of that ep of South Park where towelie makes Oprah and others believe he’s a human 😩

'There was something fishy about those papers...'

The ole mattgaetz defense. Nice

TuNah.

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