'Stealthing' Is the Dangerous Form of Sexual Abuse You Need to Know About

Stealthing is considered sexual assault by sexual violence prevention experts because it essentially turns a consensual sexual encounter into a nonconsensual one ”Stealthing is a clear violation of informed consent,” says Hall.

It’s also exceptionally dangerous. Purposefully and secretly removing or damaging a condom opens up both partners to the risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections . For women, stealthing can lead to unwanted pregnancies. “There’s also the violation of trust, autonomy, and dignity, which could have long-term psychological impact,” says Jeglic.Maybe you’ve been with someone who claimed sex felt better without a condom—one of the most common reasons men give for stealthing.

In her report, Brodsky wrote, “online writers who practice or promote nonconsensual condom removal root their actions in misogyny and investment in male sexual supremacy. While one can imagine a range of motivations for ‘stealthers’—increased physical pleasure, a thrill from degradation—online discussions suggest offenders and their defenders justify their actions as a natural male instinct—and natural male right.”Stealthing is a selfish act of power and control, says Hall.

Jeglic also suggests bringing your own condoms to make sure they aren’t damaged, checking that the condom remains on throughout intercourse, using condoms that you can feel , and asking your partner to ejaculate outside of your body .If you’ve been stealthed, the most important thing to remember is that it’s not your fault, it’s assault. You should seek medical treatment to prevent STIs and pregnancy ASAP, says Jeglic.

As physically violating is stealthing is, it can also have serious mental health ramifications. So don’t shut down or withdraw; seek support from a friend, mental health professional, and/or rape crisis helpline. Not sure where to turn? Visiting the

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