St. Louis Officials Encourage Celebrating Blues Fans To Just Burn City Down And Finally End This
ST. LOUIS—Saying that the city has had this coming for a long time and this moment was as good a time as any, St. Louis officials encouraged fans celebrating the Blues Stanley Cup victory Wednesday to just burn the city down and finally end everyone’s suffering. “To all the Blues fans out there who may be smashing windows or starting fires, all we can say is: Absolutely do that. We’ve dealt with this place for far too long, and we are ready for it to die,” said Mayor Lyda Krewson, who claimed the city was taking steps to aid any rioters by placing bins full of bricks, lighters, and baseball bats around the St. Louis along with idling bulldozers that any Blues fan could commandeer free of punishment. “Obviously, a lot of fans are going to be drunk, and we think that’s great. As long as you’re damaging property, the police aren’t going to bother you—in fact, they might even be ordered to help. Crash cars into buildings, tear apart bus stops, pull down the fucking Arch for all we care. It’s over. St. Louis isn’t worth it. We don’t give a shit anymore.” At press time, Mayor Krewson was seen greeting celebrating fans on the street before grabbing a trash can and smashing in the window of a liquor store.Read more: The Onion
MeghanSkornia 😬😬😬 rachelz971 tonycolombo971 If you thought chucktodd 's comments were mean spirited... cjdoll contrast! LGB StanleyCupChampions2019 Df E_JonesEurasia The real joke is that the St Louis Metro Police were actually caught on video smashing windows during a protest a couple years ago
Lyda Krewson, please submit your resignation and leave the country. We've got a city to burn. ShelbyMeyer_ Matt_McClure_ Wait, is the city really encouraging all 6 of them?
One More St. Louis Blues Win, And Laura Branigan's 'Gloria' Becomes An Unlikely Championship AnthemLaura Branigan's 'Gloria' has remained popular for more than 30 years, but the St. Louis Blues have turned it into a sporting anthem during their run to the Stanley Cup Finals.
Please end LA it’s trash! This is St. Louis, not Bean town. HPBitchcraft Et tu Onion? “Boston Officials Encourage Rioting Bruins Fans To Do The Same” I am starting to doubt your articles as they lack credible sources. I hope this company isn’t becoming part of the fakenewsmedia. banjopaul2149 This is pathetic. Shame on whoever thinks this is amusing.
This is preposterous - Lyda Krewson would never show this much backbone! Agree. Maybe the entire state?
Blues defeat Bruins in Game 7 to win franchise’s first Stanley CupThe St. Louis Blues beat the Boston Bruins 4-1 in Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final to secure the first title in the franchise's 52-year history. 🏋️♂️🏋️♂️🏋️♂️ 🏒🏒🏒 🏆🏆🏆 🍾🍾 Yesssh Boston Sucks and Blues Rocks!
St. Louis officials encouraged fans celebrating the StLouisBlues Stanley Cup victory Wednesday to just burn the city down and finally end everyone’s suffering. You better post the alternate article you had prepared, and not let it go to waste. We don't do that, we might burn a StanKroeke effigy. You mad, Boston Onion writers?
SarahSpain CONGRATULATIONS TO THE ICE SPORT TEAM THAT WON THE 'BEST ICE SPORT TEAM' AWARD! BleacherNation ChelseaKMerta Tough but fair... TheBrotographer
Missouri's only abortion clinic to stay open after injunction issuedThe only abortion clinic in Missouri can stay open after a St. Louis judge issue... No one said saving innocent babies from abortionists would be easy
isntfunctional 🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻 Seems legit I hope when the stlouisblues are engaging in their drunken orgies tonight they remember there’s only one abortion clinic left in the state. Most accurate headline yet tbh it won’t burn BrawleyPDX - thought you’d enjoy this HAHAHAHA... Well.. THAT didnt take long did it.. 🤣
That doesn’t sound right... lmao
Blues Defeat the Bruins in Game 7 to Win Their First Stanley CupSt. Louis sat in last place in the N.H.L. standings in early January and then soared to the first championship in the franchise’s 52-year history. fuckkellysutherland This will never get old! lgb
Cc jmaz But mostly those derelict buildings over there. Condemned. grenadine Oh oh...... Please. Someone give them torches. Burn baby, burn!!! I’ll get the popcorn and my Anthony Rizzo Jersey. Bruins were a disgrace today I suspect Boston will burn first Wow highly doubt an acting official would recommend the citizens to burn the city down. Might want to check your sources honastly. Wow.
Stanley Cup Finals: Blues beat Bruins in Game 7 for first titleMeh Congrats St Louis ! All class guys - and the best jersey is all of hockey ! Arguably the greatest playoff goal tending ever ! Binnington rocks!
Watch Bruins vs. Blues Live Streams | NBC SportsCouldn't swing the $1,500 for Stanley Cup Final tickets? Luckily, you can watch Game 7 of the NHL Stanley Cup Final online right NOW on NBC! NHL Hey CNBC THE WORLD MARKETS ARE TANKING BUT YOU NEVER MENTIO. THAT, TALK ABOUT UBER ALL THE F ING TIME! BS ARTISTS NHL I don't give a shit about sports inequality $100 million dollar athletes when military makes shit. NHL Fck you NBC for going to commercial on the Stanley Cup Champ Blues passing the cup. Shame on you A-holes