They Moan The Word “Underwhelming” In BedWe’re not psychologists, but you probably shouldn’t ignore things like booing, jeering, and throwing popcorn after intercourse.
It’s perfectly natural to be revolted by sex, but there may be a problem if your partner is verbalizing disgust after every thrust.Averaging one or two stars on your satisfaction survey is a clear sign that your genitals are performing poorly.They Keep Checking Their Watch While OrgasmingYou Catch Them Making A SandwichIf your partner makes a tuna sandwich in the middle of sex and doesn’t even offer to make you one, they’ve mentally checked out.
It looks like, the article you wrote is incorrect 😆.
Reading the onion during sex
And, here I thought she was throwing popcorn at me as a snack to keep my energy up afterwards. The booing, admittedly, was much harder to explain...
Hi The Onion! Can you pet me and call me a good boy? Thanks!
Join the fkn club honey
Bingo!
She looks up into the camera exasperated
I felt this in my soul.
Is there a Florida edition of this article?
Im thinking about a dude right now 🤣🤣
Always an ominous sign when a suggestion box unexpectedly appears at the foot of your bed.
Don't worry. She tells me.
Just marry her and have some kids. You'll both be satisfied with just a great night sleep.
☁️
Wow. I typically just make her cum 20+ times, and when I get up to take a wee and chug some electrolytes then come back for round 2 she's passed out and snoring.
1 She’s a woman End of list
Oh shit, “underwhelming” is our safe word!
They come back to life briefly to laugh at your micropenis before dying again.
Maybe he had his pants washed using exterior washing machine,
They don’t cum. /end (as long as they’re not on antidepressants, otherwise… good fucking luck)
Senor Wences was probably monogamous.
I usually just say 'why don't you have 9 boobies' while crying
They recite all of King George’s grievances within the Declaration of Independence
Oddly, my girlfriend goes crazy when I hum the BetterCallSaul theme song after 3 mins elapse.
They are doing Wordle instead.
This should be good
A 4 syllable moan takes commitment honestly
She's encouraging you to take on that super tough boss in Seikero Shadows Die Twice
Sign one: I have no partner
Well yeah, if he falls asleep during sex he probably wasn't very satisfied. She should put more effort into making it good for both of them!
1. she's my partner
They paused because they just remembered their hamster was on fire and had to leave
MattPlunkett
Y’all mfs post this every week
1. She reads The Onion
lmao
Number 1. Your doing it alone
Sign 1. No interest in clicking link
If you look like this, this article may also concern you
Who took this pic?
'She put a bag on my head!' 'Still counts!'
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