Report: Crane Operator Last Remaining Fulfilling Occupation In U.S.

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WASHINGTON—A report released Tuesday by the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics revealed that crane operator is the last career in the United States that offers personal fulfillment. “With its flexible hours, surprisingly high pay, and clear sense of what the job’s goal is and how to accomplish it, crane operator easily ranks above every other American profession in terms of basic worker satisfaction,” read the report, which also noted that the occupation is the only remaining job that does not fill workers with a sense of deep malaise or existential angst. “Every single documented utterance of the phrase ‘I love my job’ over the past 10 years has occurred in a crane.” The report also indicated that the career next closest to offering any sense of gratification was tugboat captain, as people with that job get to watch seagulls and only entertain thoughts of suicide three times a week.

 

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MichelleyM Whoa. Too soon. Funny, but too soon.

Hey Onion you're supposed to write FAKE news, this one is getting a little too real

Tell that to the one that was fired for calling out the corners being cut days before the new orleans building collapsed.

gyroEMILYfeta did you write this?

Fake news. You can also be a chronic masturbator. You have no idea how much satisfaction that provides for you.

Because dropping things on cars is exceptionally fulfilling.

NashvilleScene WPLN :)

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