Remorseful Beto O’Rourke Admits His Family Responsible For My Lai Massacre, Triangle Shirtwaist Factory Fire

📆 7/15/2019 5:19 PM
📰 TheOnion

⏱ Reading Time:
1 sec. here
2 min. at publisher
📊 Quality Score:
News: 4%
Publisher: 51%

United States Headlines News

United States Latest News,United States Headlines

EL PASO, TX—Following on the heels of an announcement that he and his wife were the descendants of slave-owners, Democratic presidential candidate Beto O’Rourke went further Monday by admitting that members of his family were responsible for the My Lai Massacre as well as the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory Fire. “The issues of war crimes and worker exploitation have long been important to me, but they’ve taken on additional significance since I’ve learned about my uncle Roger O’Rourke, who served as a commander in Vietnam and gave the orders leading to the mass murder of civilians in South Vietnam, as well as my great-grandfather once removed, Eunice O’Rourke, who owned and operated the garment factory that caught fire and led to the death of 146 employees,” wrote O’Rourke in an emotional Medium post, noting that he himself had benefitted from an exploitative system of privilege built by his ancestors, including a cousin who piloted the Hindenburg and his maternal great-aunt, “Typhoid Mary” Mallon, who was the original vector for the deadly disease. “The descendants of those who survived the Donner Party, Salem Witch Trials, and the U.S.S. Indianapolis shark attack did so despite the odds being stacked against them by my family. The fact that I have been the beneficiary of this corrupt system only gives me a greater sense of urgency in working as hard as I can to level the playing field.” O’Rourke added that he had done a lot of soul-searching about his lineage after the revelation that one of his earliest ancestors had invented murder by slaying his brother, Abel.

Write Comment

You forgot 'sells terrible ketchup:

Bastards!

The Great Depression, New Coke in 1985, cookie cutter astroturf baseball stadiums in the 1970's. It's all on his family.

Wow you're making fun of a dem.

This dudes so edgy

Beto is calling himself Racist for his blatant Cultural Appropriation of his name. He is also giving all of his campaign donations to candidates of color because of his White Privilege. Beto will begin protesting his own campaign offices with ANTIFA because he hates colonialists.

Should have run against Cornyn.

We can finally clear Lizzie Borden of all wrongdoing

Well, at least those are two MORE things than realDonaldTrump has EVER apologized for, huh? 🙄

I suspect he had some involvement with the Fyre Festival debacle as well.....

/\\

they also kidnapped the lindbergh baby and co-conspired with ted cruz’ father to assassinate jfk

On ice of a new day

They also sunk the Eastland

maybe he can speak spanish to get out of it lol

I meant to ask this, and the above linked comment reminded me. When did Drudge turn so left? Is he a NeverTrumper? He rarely links anything positive unless it is ambiguous whether Trump gets credit.

“Beto OhhRourke I” We the People won’t vote for Beto OhhRourke, sounds like Obama both speak double talk, Donald Trump for President don’t need OhhRourke pork, put a cork in the mouth of OhhRourke.

One De Beto O’Rourke

IWiIlkaga Looks like every other spoiled brat I've ever seen sitting in a corner.🤦‍♀️

😂😂😂

ChrisKringle99 ...and Wounded Knee.

ByronYork I heard is planning a major speech to apologize for leaving the seat up! What a leader!

I heard the O’Rourkes ran MK-Ultra for the CIA. The Hindenburg and Titanic were clearly O’Rourke family operations too. If he doesn’t apologize for those, he’s toast.

ByronYork Donate here.

That made me laugh out loud

Asked for comment, the floundering politician said, 'If you really think about it, my family is directly responsible for most of the injustice in the country, in all forms, so I'm the only one who knows how to fix it.'

😂 The Titanic, hurricane Katrina, Jack the Ripper, Exxon Valdez and Chernobyl were several other horrible events that a teary eyed Beto claimed he and his family were responsible for and hopes to get elected so he can make amends. BetoORourke

CHSommers Are onion headlines written by bots?

Perhaps apologize for being a middle aged teenager.

Still not voting for you. Maybe if you fess up to the Jimmy Hoffa murder we can talk?

ShrinkGov This butthead is simply a giant morsel of feces and surprises.🤭

The point isn’t that he thinks of crazy things his family did to take responsibility for, the point is that he bends over backwards to pander to white guilt politics. This headline isn’t good

He is a hot mess time to pull out of the race. And take some anxiety meds you always look like your hyped up.

CHSommers One of his ancestors was tricked into eating an apple by a snake...

ByronYork Everyone needs to read this thread! It is one of the funniest I have ever read 😂😂

ByronYork O'Rourke is pathetic!

ArtDecider?

And a forebear also broke up the Beatles.

ByronYork I believe one of his family started the Chicago Fire.

ByronYork Jimmy Hoffa?

This nitwit needs a therapist.

McVeigh was framed. Justice for OKC.

cpmckenna somethingfell

samuelucarrillo I hear that his grandparents helped the Germans bomb Pearl Harbor.

CHSommers lol. So, when are he and his wife donating their fortune for reparations?

😂😂😂

He is resposible for the bermudas triangle.

What happened to his Latin heritage? I also heard he started the genetic trait in his family coined “No balls Beto Beta”.

ByronYork Karma sucks 😆😆😆

redsteeze O.M.G. Brilliant is actually better than the real 'news'...

ByronYork Oh the humanity😂🤣😂

NathanHale007

ByronYork Challenge Beto to make public the pre-nuptial agreement his father-in-law made him sign....

I can forgive you Beto, but can Julius Caesar!

ByronYork Troubled young man who wants to be President. Surreal. Only in America can a doof like that make headlines.

Tracinski Boy, sometimes I wish these things were written by theonion and weren't true.

ByronYork This guy gets more desperate everyday. Please give it up while you can keep just a little dignity

ByronYork I don't know how he lives with own guilt-ridden self....according to him: 'I'm the worst person ever conceived (except all those Trumpist white supremacists)- but elect me!'

ByronYork World War 2 and also 9/11 I heard!

ByronYork This guy has mental issues. He needs professional help.

ByronYork Poor Beto. :(

LizMair Beto responsible for first Neandrathal civil war

redsteeze Beto O'Rourke killed Bruce Wayne's parents.

Wow fuck this guy

He also ate the last donut

I heard his family is also the ones who let the dogs out.

We know tedcruz father was involved with Kennedy

I can’t believe his family did 9/11

And Coke 2

I heard he's also responsible for leaving the cap on some toothpaste tubes just a little bit loose so that the paste squeezes out in the bag on the car ride home and leaves you with a gooey head of lettuce. TheHorror

theonion Guys, you need to step up your game as reality is becoming closer and closer to your headers. If this trend continues you'll be just a news outlet pretty soon!

Raised with Catholic guilt has me apologizing for being the shooter on the grassy knoll who killed Kennedy. I’m sorry about Jimmy Hoffa as well.

An election is a great time to announce you’re descended from slave-owners. It might go better to announce you’re descended from a slave. Maybe people’d be more empathetic, idk...

He is the biggest bozo in the entire Dem primary, and that's saying something considering that DeBlasio is on the list.

He does apologize for something at least once a day

Still a better strategy than Buttigieg pretending to be black because his dad was from Malta.

Get that man a counsellor.

THE Children or grand children or great 20 times down the relation ladder is not at fault for what was done before them!!! I have an early president in my family and I am not responsible for what ever he did. They were men of their day who were NOT perfect!

Not to mention Teutoburg Forest.

Fox and Friends tomorrow: ^^^^

what matters is that Beto's family has mattered! they've always mattered! no matter how atrociously!

Feckin shart

His family also responsible for the black plague. This is a tough scene

'Hey, HEY look at me! Hey, MY family owned slaves too! Heyyyyy! Why is no one talking about this, don't you want to talk about this? Hey!'

But he still won't cop to the JFK assassination, will he?

How do you stop him from suing for defamation

Does this mean we have to watch him get his teeth cleaned again?

Heard they also did Trail of Tears

Beto is a fury.

He also raped my pet pony

wow that was fast

We have summarized this news so that you can read it quickly. If you are interested in the news, you can read the full text here. Read more:

United States Latest News, United States Headlines

Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.

With summer heating up, Beto O'Rourke's campaign cools downHere are the stories our panel of top political reporters will be watching for in the week ahead, in today's 'Inside Politics' forecast. Beto might not even be above 3% nationally if not for Texas, and doesn't have anything really going in the early states. It looks grim. It never rose above Luke warm. This is probably the only bit of truth you've spewed in 3 years.
Source: CNN - 🏆 4. / 95 Read more »

Beto O'Rourke says his family's ancestors owned slavesHe said the revelation created an urgency to 'change this country so that it works for those who have been locked-out of — or locked-up in — this system.' Wow! Shocking! 😱 Will he be giving his possessions away now in reparation? Time for honky wannabe mexican to pay reparations
Source: NBCNews - 🏆 10. / 86 Read more »

Beto O’Rourke says ancestor owned slavesBeto O’Rourke said Sunday that he and his wife, Amy, are descended from people who owned slaves Hes a Democrat....hes still a slave owner. Robert Francis O’Rourke is cancelled yall and thats the tea sis 👏
Source: politico - 🏆 381. / 59 Read more »

Beto O'Rourke says he and his wife are descendants of slave ownersDemocratic presidential candidate Beto O'Rourke on Sunday said he was recently given documents showing that he and his wife, Amy, are descendants of slave owners, writing in a Medium post that the legacy of slavery 'now has a much more personal connection.' Okay, so enough with the slave ownership. Wow, so was the family of Kamala Harris. Bahahahahahahahaha omg no wonder the entire left wing is crumbling.
Source: CNN - 🏆 4. / 95 Read more »

Beto O'Rourke says he descended from slave owners, supports reparationsLol I'm a descendant of a moral Christian great grandfather that was killed with typhoid fever in the early 1900's. There was an epidemic of approximately 10,000 supposed typhoid fever deaths. Where are the reparations for our great grandfather's lifetime of lost wages? So let him pay reparations. No one is stopping him.
Source: USATODAY - 🏆 100. / 63 Read more »

Beto O'Rourke says he descended from slave owners, supports reparationsI think we might have V.P. material here. Jul 10, 2019 · The ancestors of Sen. Kamala Harris (D-CA) owned slaves — according to her father, Stanford University economics professor Donald Harris. CapitolWilhite Read what Beto said in his own words here: He is right.People in the USA who have slave ancestors should have reparations,just like Native Americans.
Source: USATODAY - 🏆 100. / 63 Read more »