Police, Race, Vol 54 Issue 32

Police, Race

Police Officer Wouldn’t Have Killed Black Man If He Knew Everyone Would Make Such A Big Fuss About It

Police Officer Wouldn’t Have Killed Black Man If He Knew Everyone Would Make Such A Big Fuss About It

5/27/2020 1:44:00 AM

Police Officer Wouldn’t Have Killed Black Man If He Knew Everyone Would Make Such A Big Fuss About It

MILWAUKEE, WI—Expressing his deep and heartfelt regrets regarding how the incident has played out in the media, Milwaukee police officer Ian Feeny said Monday that he would never have killed an unarmed black man during a routine traffic stop if he had known that everyone would make such a big fuss about the incident. “When I review the unfortunate events of the night of July 11, I’m forced to admit that conducting myself differently and reacting with less violence would have avoided this whole hubbub,” said Feeny, who referred to the negative media exposure he had received in recent weeks, on top of the sheer amount of paperwork he’d been made to file, as “a heartbreaking tragedy.” “Living with the consequences of my actions, with the sheer weight of public opinion concerning my police work, has been a life-altering inconvenience. I can’t wait until this whole chapter ends with an innocent verdict in my favor.” After receiving word that he’d be placed on paid leave, an exasperated Feeny complained, “This is the reward I get for being a good guy,” and not planting guns and drugs on the victim’s body.

Read more: The Onion »

What did he think would happen. This makes it sound like he intended to kill him.. 1st degree murder. Light his ass up Too fucking soon. I guess if the victim was white the knee to the neck never would have happened. Unrelated but is there any mass shooting recently? I kinda miss the well known Onion post about it.

Do the people in the comments realize this is the onion, and it isnt making fun of the guy who was killed, but the officers who did it. Not that difficult to grasp lt_freedom WTF!! I like you guys.... I get the sarcasm but.. yea. This one is too oniony. everyone in here saying 'way too early' when they're just linking an article from 2 years ago

Wtf onion, not funny man They forgot the other two excuses - 'I had a sudden attack of negrophobia,' and 'I was just having a bad day.' sometimes i forget i follow the onion dama_dd1 He would have done it anyway, if it wasn't made public so all could see he most likely would have gotten away with it. I don't know who some people think they are that people have to take their crap.

Shame on white people allrespectforblackpeople Tf is if he knew he wouldn’t kill him like for god sake why would he in the first place I’m not black but white people are the worst y’all disgust the shit out of me have some respect try to learn what is respect instead of trying to prove that black people aren’t worthy

facexmelter The American government calls for freedom and human rights, but in America it is not What happened to 'Be BEST'? I'm so glad Trump has spoken against this horrible tragedy.... Said no one ever.realDonaldTrump MELANIATRUMP I've never remotely thought of doing this before but the 'Ergonomics' bit on your website and this, today, aren't cutting edge, they are disgusting. Maybe tell the 12 year old that found them giggly.

yes he wouldve FrancisNgannou_ Lol this is dog shit This may be satire, but seriously... Boundaries! Especially on a subject matter such as this. Im a fan but thats too much, not funny, not cool, not ok Hopefully true, keep fussing y'all. Well said. Where the hell are these officers coming from? Right off the firing line after shooting at Arabs?

Totally not funny That's not true. They'd kill a black man even, and especially, when everyone makes such a big fuss about it. Too soon. Aaaaaaand this was written two years ago. Things haven’t changed. I'm wondering if this will be another ''No Way To Prevent This,' Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens'

This isn’t satire. This reminds me of Carson Wentz fans being racist Listen if white jokes are funny. Black jokes are too... You guys are Killing it today, Literally seethe, oh triggered ones, seethe If this makes y'all uncomfortable, it's because it's supposed to. it's funny because it's true Well, that's tactless. Are you even paying attention to the news?

'Buddy told me 'Read the room, pal,' and that sorta got to me. I mean, that IS our room, or at least I thought it was. 'Still cool to harass illegals, though, right? I just want some safe ground to tread and do my job.' This is when satire earns it's keep. cops don't exist. I was getting ready to say “THIS ISNT A LIE WHAT” and then went “oh yeah, because he still would’ve killed the black man” fml

Isn't there a three strike rule on that? Police carry around such a heavy load of “I’ve gotta hold the line, show them I mean business, never step back” like, how bout believe in the justice system a bit more Jesus Fucking Christ jasthemetiche you guys have some nerve doing this type shit baiting people into yelling 'too soon!' at a post from two years ago is some 4d chess level humor. 🔥

Too soon It was just one person. Some people just don't know how to take a joke I would not have gained all the weight if I had known how much food I was consuming. I’m confused This was a real headline btw Satire?.. Wait.. No.. Or.. Yes? Was this on purpose or just the next one in line? Too soon? It's 2 years old...

that should at least be weighed in favor of leniency Too soon, too late, too true. Before anyone gets mad they posted this 15 days after 9/11 Too soon sis 😔 “Joke Website that made 9/11 jokes immediately, still making dark humor jokes 9 years later, much to amazing amazement of amazed amazers” Now you're just playing the algorithm game here... what will farm the most comments, regardless of the cost to your brand. You're supposed to lampoon bullshit by punching up... redirect.. ffs...

Imagine being an adult in 2020 and still don't understand The Onion's way of doing social commentary I hope he likes porridge 🥣😯 Jesus, u cant read anything at face value anymore. How true or fake is this It’s funny how many people don’t know what satire is the timeline is lit People spending time getting angry at this joke when their time would be better spent getting angry over cops killing people.

tell em stanley: He needs to go to prison. Him and his buddies that did nothing. The onion :let me trigger these niggas Okay, that’s enough. Muted. Someone tweet if they become funny again. Satire police applying knee to the Onion’s neck. Wow, dark humour... Yup. Often times the point of satire is to shock you into paying attention. Yes, even you, the white person feeling discomfort right now.

You should delete this one ASAP. Pretty much. All officers in my armed garrison are instructed to do the same per my supreme command. Comply with social distancing or suffer the mortal consequences Too soon? Oy vey. Okay, I love you... But... Damn guys. WAY too early. Geez, read the room. Man, I remember when the onion was funny....

I don't know if this is it.

Black man dies in Minneapolis police custody after video shows officer kneeling on neckVideo from a bystander showed a white officer kneeling on the man's neck during his arrest as he pleaded that he couldn't breathe. Only in MN? We need a black VP! Now! SenKamalaHarris. Not two white people over 70. TakeAKnee

4 Police Officers Fired After A Black Man Dies In Minneapolis Police CustodyFour Minneapolis Police Department officers have been fired after the death of George Floyd, who was seen in a video repeatedly crying out “I cannot breath” as an officer kneeled on his neck. 💔💔💔 Good, now prosecute them for murder

Four officers fired after black man dies in Minneapolis police custody and video shows an officer kneeling on his neckVideo from a bystander showed a white officer kneeling on the man's neck during his arrest as he pleaded that he couldn't breathe. The man later died. Should they go to jail? Good job so far now let’s put these criminals in jail. Looting in 3.2.1.....

‘I cannot breathe!’: FBI investigates death of black man in Minneapolis after video shows police officer kneeling on his neck'I cannot breathe!': FBI investigates death of black man after video shows cop kneeling on his neck America is fucked Up! Apartheid and white supremacy is flourishing in 3rd world USA. I am disgusted by the country and the white supreme behaviour. This is abuse of power and murder. A white American cop kills a black man? Stop lying. That doesn’t happen in 2020.... oh wait...

Soldiers, police enforce Indonesia's 'new normal' coronavirus restrictionsIndonesia's military ordered the deployment of hundreds of thousands of soldiers and police on Monday to enforce rules on wearing masks and safe distancing after reports of people in the world's fourth-most populous nation flouting them. Sounds like Indonesia is turning more authoritarian Doesn’t sound surprising at all So windows ten latino version are more distributed.

Central Park woman who called police on black man apologizes: NBC News - InsiderA New York woman who called the police and falsely claimed that there was an 'African-American man threatening her life' said her actions were 'unacceptable' This is Business Insider? Not good enough. She needs to be charged.