NEW YORK—Diplomats and personnel from dozens of nations stopped and stared upon entering the U.N. General Assembly Hall this morning and seeing that the night-shift janitor had left a brilliant solution to the Israeli–Palestinian Conflict on the chalkboard, sources reported Wednesday. “My God, he did it—he figured it out,” said astonished U.N.
military hegemony in Israel, dismantle its apartheid state, and aid Palestinian efforts toward self-determination. “This is a once-in-a-generation diplomatic genius we’re confronted with here. He worked out all the boundaries, the land swaps, the right of return, everything. Entire careers have been devoted to the crafting of a Middle East peace accord, but for some reason, no one has ever come close to anything like this.
He doesn't look the part. Needs more Matt Damon.
Good bill punting
delete religion, and problem is solved.
Before dumping Minnie Driver on national TV.
friend_robbie
Maybe he was being Ironical.
And not being an elected politician it was immediately erased. Helping reinstate that only elected officials know your best intrests.
I thought this was a photo of Craig T. Nelson.
Good job💪🏾🍾
Trump to Jewish Americans: 'It is your fault.'
He doesn’t look like a politician so it must be a good idea.
why tf are so many of these replies political wtf
BulgeMcBeans666
Good Chill Hunting
The Onion used to be funny.
UN has stolen Palestine from Palestinians to give it to the Israelis colonizers& it's been covering its' crimes since 1940's!!
Great piece. About the way it would go. Well done.
If he's still there in 10 years, let's kick his ass.
Wow, they should make a movie. Is Ben Afleck available?
And alas, it was blown up by an IED
My idea was to move the UN headquarters from New York to Jerusalem with the idea that the future world government would also be centered there. Got wiped by the morning shift tho'
'At press time, reports confirmed the chalkboard had been erased and the United States had used its leverage on the U.N. Security Council to hire a new janitor.'
There is no final solution.
LMAO I love this
which got erased in the morning by the logic as a second language professor
I don't want to hold them drop...
“…and the United States had used its leverage on the U.N. Security Council to hire a new janitor.” must be on Israhell’s fucky list. God bless them. ♥️✌️🇵🇸
Subsidizing apartheid was not part of the equation.
Milk and Honey available in the employee lounge.
Isreal = ABBA = Palestine
Well, he would probably do a better job than Jared. Do you all remember when Jared got sent there to negotiate. I feels like a lifetime ago but was only a couple of years ago, and before the mosque invasion, rockets, air strikes and flammable balloons.
He just wrote... End apartheid & give Palestinians their land back.
DanielLarison Priceless. Douglas Feith worthy. aipac
He maintains a good will for hunting, too
Lem'me guess. Will Hunting?
Solution: cancel religion and Evi ideologies
Sure, only one problem. There’s no such thing
No surprise,he’s probably smarter than those U.N.guys anyway.
'kill the batman'
omg Why doesn't he have his own YouTube channel yet Is he a reclusive genius?
HAHAHAHAHA
jstreetdotorg should follow up.
it just says final solution
Was it 'The Pretty Obvious If You Think About It Accord'?
Capitalism is chock-full of wasted talent.
And some dude just cleaned that chalkboard to write down the daily lunch specials at the cafeteria. Sorry Middle East bros…
Craig T Nelson is the night janitor for the U.N.?
AlanTudyk Brilliant
Bad Will Hunting
How bout them apples?
Just stop fighting lol
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