Nestlé Announces Consumers Free To Sexualize Raisinets All They Want

Nestlé Announces Consumers Free To Sexualize Raisinets All They Want

Nestlé, Foods

1/21/2022 11:15:00 PM

Nestlé Announces Consumers Free To Sexualize Raisinets All They Want

VEVEY , SWITZERLAND—Pledging to never stand in the way of the “raw animal magnetism” the candies were world-renowned for, Nestlé released a statement Friday announcing that consumers were free to sexualize Raisinets all they wanted. “Whether you want to use a box to stimulate yourself to the point of orgasm, or simply…

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And Tootsie Rolls? 30 years ahead of you Nestlé The greatest line in the history of mankind. I've been horny for milk duds before it was cool to fuck candy. We're not the same. Fun fact: people actually pay money to buy this thing Oh fuck, maybe I'm starting to realize this is a reference to a possible public statement about the green m&m because we live in clown timeline

They don’t miss eelssaaaa 👀 Dirty little grapes!! Don't mind if I do!

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Been there, done that. I will! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Roflllll MaroanaLove Oh god finally, spiritual guidance F raisinette. Not vegan. Finally croctologist conflictedren finally Related: Reese's Dares Consumers To Not Think About Sex When Eating Peanut Butter Cups

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This is funny, but fuck nestle Boxed rabbit turds Heard that shit through da grapevine. They do look like little scrotums. Scrotuses? Scrotae? *Raisinettes Raisinets - the candy that stays the same going in and coming out. Am I wrong for only liking the dark chocolate ones? 🤣 Screams in Middle Dutch: Raisinets are sexist

Oooooo, I’m going to stick this whole fruit, up my whole ass daddy

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And like Mars, it's not even close to the worst thing they ever done Some will want to marry Mr. Peanut. (record needle drops) iz ouuunnn........ Fun Fact: I can insert Raisinets into my nostrils with my tongue. Soon to offer Raisinfishnets. Perfect timing *Crashing breathlessly through furniture, panes of glass and innocent bystanders* 'BUT WHAT'S BETWEEN IT'S LEEEEEEGS!!'

Nestle Raisinets - we took out the water so you don’t have to! Finally

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Alerts VEVEY, SWITZERLAND—Pledging to never stand in the way of the “raw animal magnetism” the candies were world-renowned for, Nestlé released a statement Friday announcing that consumers were free to sexualize Raisinets all they wanted. “Whether you want to use a box to stimulate yourself to the point of orgasm, or simply close your eyes and imagine an anthropomorphic Raisinet standing in the corner of your bedroom watching while you and your partner have intercourse, Nestlé wants you to know that we don’t just tolerate your desires—we encourage them,” said CEO Mark Schneider, who raised one of the tiny chocolate-covered confections up into the air at a press conference as he described it as “a tiny nymphet ready to fuck.” “Plus, what’s really great about Raisinets is that you can project whatever kind of traits you want onto them. Draw them with sultry pouts and long legs, or perhaps huge biceps and hairy chests, your choice. It’s all fair game. Inside every package is a mind-blowing orgy of Raisinets fucking and sucking each other, if that’s what you want to hear.” At press time, Schneider had begun unbuckling his pants to give a demonstration.