My Mother’s Attempts to Lift My Spirits Leave Me Feeling Crushed

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Dear Care and Feeding: I'm losing hope, and my mom is definitely not helping matters.

You are not ungrateful. You are in an understandably fragile state of mine . How about being utterly honest with your mother? This does not have to be “crushing” to her. Tell her you love her, you value your relationship with her, you’re delighted that she is so excited about the possibility of grandchildren, but because of your experiences of pregnancy so far—and because you are so hopefulworried and fearful about what will happen next—you cannot bear seeing or hearing about these purchases.

She just needs to keep themexperience, and your request of her, then the work you’ve done to mend your relationship with her, I’m afraid, has been in vain. She will not be able to be a good mother to you even now, and you are going to have to distance yourself from her. I hope it doesn’t come to that—I hope she can hear you and really take it what you tell her. One’s responsibility to be loving and respectful of one’s children does not end when they reach adulthood.

 

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