passed away. She was a force of light and goodness, and her loss impacted us both deeply. At this point in our lives, we would have been separated anyway — I was still in California, going to college and living with our mom. He was in on the East Coast going to an Ivy League school. It was normal for us to be apart now: siblings don't stay together forever. The tensions over being raised separately started to evaporate, because no one was raising us any more.
, and we realized what we had in each other. We never acknowledged it, but something about losing someone so close to us made us realize how our separation didn't need to mean a permanent split in our relationship. We were honest with each other about why we had been so upset over the years, and we both agreed to let things go. I talked about my jealousy, and he talked about how my attitude and insecurities impacted him. We both apologized for a lot of things that had been said in anger.
Through this, I've learned that siblings shouldn't be separated if the situation can be avoided. Our separation caused problems that didn't need to exist, and our relationship suffered for it. We lost time we'll never get back. But I also learned that separating from a sibling doesn't need to be a permanent problem. The key is to remember what brings you together, and not what separates you.
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