Minneapolis Police Now Requiring Officers To Undergo Ergonomics Training To Better Protect Knees

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MINNEAPOLIS—Apologizing for a lack of oversight following the death of George Floyd after police officer Derek Chauvin pinned him to the ground, Minneapolis Police Department officials announced Tuesday that they are now requiring all officers to undergo ergonomics training to better protect their knees. “After reviewing video of the incident, we are disturbed by the officer repeatedly placing excessive stress on the knee joint, and will immediately implement stretching protocols to ensure this never happens again,” said a spokesperson for the Minneapolis police, noting that the officer’s actions were completely antithetical to the department’s standards for long-term joint health. “Frankly, the officer could have done permanent damage to his ACL while crushing a suspect’s windpipe like that. If our officers are going to be out in the field kneeing people in the neck over and over again, that’s a repeat-use injury just waiting to happen, and we must address it. We need to ensure all of our officers know how to act in a more dangerous situation where they may be required to lift with their backs.” The Minneapolis Police Department added that normally they would place the involved officer on desk duty, but in this case they didn’t want to risk causing further damage to his knees.

 

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MinneapolisPD Once upon a time you used to be funny

MinneapolisPD

MinneapolisPD Poor taste...

MinneapolisPD 😅😂

MinneapolisPD i get it, it's the onion, but all cops are bastards

MinneapolisPD To all the offended people right now, get over yourselves. This literally happens EVERY day across our country, if you're really that mad about it so something about it. Bunch of 12 year Karens in training!

MinneapolisPD Those saying this is 'too soon' are just worried about people getting angry enough for actual change to occur. It's SUPPOSED TO MAKE YOU MAD. YOU SHOULD BE MAD! NOTHING WILL CHANGE OTHERWISE!

MinneapolisPD Shame on you.

MinneapolisPD White cops only.

drogon_dracarys MinneapolisPD Too soon

MinneapolisPD Too soon onion

MinneapolisPD Y'all.

MinneapolisPD Man! The onion is really having to get dark for satire to outdo how insane and dark our world actually. Sad commentary.

MinneapolisPD bad joke

MinneapolisPD Too soon?

MinneapolisPD Yeah idk about this one...

MinneapolisPD This is a no.

MinneapolisPD This crossed a line. Disappointing to see you publish something mocking a racist murder.

MinneapolisPD Not funny

MinneapolisPD

MinneapolisPD This is necessary. Anyone complaining about this is missing the point.

MinneapolisPD Yeah not funny. Delete this Onion please.

MinneapolisPD Is this photo of an actual murder? Pretty sure you shouldn’t use it for comedy.

MinneapolisPD Too soon

abelinasabrina MinneapolisPD A man died.

MinneapolisPD Good god

MinneapolisPD Jesus that is nasty

fredric_wertham MinneapolisPD That took some balls, well played.

MinneapolisPD Without hesitation! In front of public eye!! I cant even imagine what they were doing in dark places. Unbelievable, disgusting, words are not enough to explain how i feel. How people become such evils. No need for hell as it is here already. Condolences from Turkey 🇹🇷

MinneapolisPD People are saying too soon. But it's not. This is satires way of dealing with issues. We have to talk about this. We need to be having discussions on how to improve police departments so that these cases never happen again

MinneapolisPD I love you guys.... have been a regular follower since the early 90’s but this is Absolutely tasteless.

MinneapolisPD Pfffff

MinneapolisPD ooooooh onion not this one

MinneapolisPD jesus christ

MinneapolisPD Pretty fucking gross

GauPhd MinneapolisPD Way out of line. A human being died. Not the time for satire.

MinneapolisPD

MinneapolisPD There is no too soon. Your readers are getting weaker.

MinneapolisPD You are 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 today. I imagine the writer shed a few tears after this one. You don't land a punch like this and come out unscathed.

MinneapolisPD Bootlickers

MinneapolisPD This one really sucks

MinneapolisPD This one got me laughing

MinneapolisPD I think it’s very amusing that if you click on the users who are criticising the Onion for being insensitive, you’ll find they’ve said absolutely nothing else about this story. No criticism of the police. Nothing. More offended by satire than reality.

MinneapolisPD Omg lol

MinneapolisPD Why the murderer cop isn’t arrested yet

MinneapolisPD Happy Memorial Day

MinneapolisPD Too soon 😬

MinneapolisPD knee all knoo whe this go

MinneapolisPD Ew. Love the onion...but no.

MinneapolisPD Nothing humorous about this. Please! 😭

MinneapolisPD I'm somewhat sure this is satire.

MinneapolisPD

MinneapolisPD Is this supposed to be funny? I know you’re satire, but a man is dead!

MinneapolisPD 😳👀

cameron_kasky MinneapolisPD Hear we go again - these GOD DAMN COPS across America just do NOT learn. Obviously, those cops are CROOKED and what the Hell do they teach them in Stupid Police Academy? And yes, these BAD cops should be in put prison or better yet, be given the Death Penalty.

MinneapolisPD Too soon

MinneapolisPD Too soon

MinneapolisPD Sweet Muscular Jesus

MinneapolisPD This is fucking gross. We know you’re a satire page but have some fucking decency.

MinneapolisPD No. My god.

MinneapolisPD Wow, I usually want to hear all the FACTS before sounding off on cases such as these, but the officer with his knee/body weight on the suspects neck, is so far over the line, that the line’s a dot. There will be charges filed against the officers, they were out of line.

MinneapolisPD Not funny.

MinneapolisPD Not cool.

MinneapolisPD The Onion's not playing around any more.

MinneapolisPD Too soon

MinneapolisPD They need Gloves! He kept his hands in his pockets his hands were Cold! Poor White Police officers they have it so Bad.

MinneapolisPD I bet a white person wrote this. Have some fucking respect.

MinneapolisPD Not White vs Black Blue vs Us

MinneapolisPD 'We are disturbed by the officer repeatedly placing excessive stress on the knee joint, and will immediately implement stretching protocols to ensure this never happens again.'

MinneapolisPD Wow, this is the first time I've ever seen an Onion piece that was just downright offensive and not funny. What if Floyd George's family saw this? The guy's body isn't even cold yet. What the fuck were you idiots thinking?! Delete this, immediately.

Not funny. Not ok.

MinneapolisPD not funny

MinneapolisPD Chicago misses you. The old ones No cuthulu

MinneapolisPD Oh boy. I laugh at inappropriate humor all the time and enjoy satire. Tragedy can make good comedy. This though? It's simply disgusting. Seriously, take it down.

MinneapolisPD You always find the perfect angle six seconds after something awful happens. I am very, very jealous.

GSorensen MinneapolisPD Dude, woah! Nah, fuck it. Nothing matters anymore. Go for the eyes.

MinneapolisPD Sorry, not funny today.

MinneapolisPD Yikes guys

MinneapolisPD Savage

MinneapolisPD This is dark and way to soon... This is why I love The Onion.

MinneapolisPD Not funny.

MinneapolisPD The onion literally had an article during the DC sniper attacks to “serpentine will pumping your gas” and y’all are acting surprised by this.

MinneapolisPD Too soon 😬

MinneapolisPD Knees that crack loud are the silent killers

MinneapolisPD Is this funny?

MinneapolisPD It’s ok. The cop wasn’t kneeling during the national anthem

MinneapolisPD Too soon

MinneapolisPD Delete this sis

MinneapolisPD WAAAY too soon for that one, guys

MinneapolisPD yeah that doesn't look easy on the knees..you gota hand it to the cop.. he was determined to murder that man

MinneapolisPD Unfollowing

MinneapolisPD You can tell Onion articles don’t give author info because nobody would sign their name to this if they did

MinneapolisPD holy fuck guys

MinneapolisPD I like The Onion but this is really disgusting

MinneapolisPD The joke is pretty disgusting. A black man was murdered, again, by the police

MinneapolisPD This is not okay

cameron_kasky MinneapolisPD Not funny. This time your satire is gross.

MinneapolisPD I see a lot of people in this room that don't understand how satirical news works.

MinneapolisPD You missed the memo about 'you can joke about anything. but it depends on the joke' - This joke is not good enough to cut through.

MinneapolisPD Wanna say too soon ,but

MinneapolisPD No

MinneapolisPD Oh fuck

Delcannan MinneapolisPD The Onion:

MinneapolisPD Jeeeeeesus this is spicy 🌶

cameron_kasky MinneapolisPD Ouch.

MinneapolisPD I don't believe in a too soon, outside of personal feelings. So kudos onion for jumping on this.

MinneapolisPD Unfollowed.

MinneapolisPD We don’t need an Onion take on this one! At least not this take! Delete this tweet!

MinneapolisPD take this down!

MinneapolisPD Take this shit down! It’s disgraceful

MinneapolisPD This isn’t funny!

MinneapolisPD It’s supposed to make you cringe... and think

MinneapolisPD The dark, truthful Onion is the best Onion

MinneapolisPD

MinneapolisPD Come on... this is just distasteful..

MinneapolisPD Is the onion betting that the law enforcement investigations will find nothing wrong & only that the officers method of killing should be protected by policy ?

MinneapolisPD This is a bad attempt at satire. The end.

MinneapolisPD 👎

MinneapolisPD Maybe the 'taking a knee' cop, after a long stint in prison, can hook up with the racist Central Park, bramble bitch . . . and they can never live happily ever after.

MinneapolisPD The sickest part about this, is that his obvious, public, and filmed murder will be listed as a COVID19 death. Who runs Minnesota? Who runs Minneapolis? Chief of police? City counsel? Want to take a guess... WalkAway

MinneapolisPD No comments about this story, Onion?

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