Man Who Can't Get Enough Mucus Enjoying Winter Season

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CHICAGO—Saying that he’s always up for having more mucus congesting every part of his respiratory system, local man Michael Harrison told reporters this morning that he was really delighting in the winter season. “I tell you, there is nothing I like better than the feeling of phlegm pouring out of my nose and caking over my raw, exposed nostrils,” said Harrison, who added that struggling to pull air through his mucus-suffused nose and mouth was just one of the many things that made winter his favorite time of the year. “What can I say? I’m a mucus man!” At press time, an utterly delighted Harrison was wiping frozen phlegm off of his nose and lips with the back of his coarse winter glove.

 

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This is so disgusting, lol

It's not even winter yet.

He speaks Phlegmish

He's forgetting the flies, mucus and flies goes together like hamburgers and fries.

I would like to donate all my mucus to this man, both present and future. Someone get me a bucket!

small point...is that a man in the picture?

Mmm, mucus...

Hahahahaha

Makes a great stocking stuffer

⬅️ Fellow Mucus Man. snot

If it's Chicago, it may be Pizza Casserole, not phlegm.

at least there's one person, gotta find a way to send him mine

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