It takes a village to raise kids, but kids deserve a village too

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Last week I had everything I needed for my dinner recipe except for shallots. I went to the grocery store but didn’t find the shallots in their usual place, tucked...

Last week I had everything I needed for my dinner recipe except for shallots. I went to the grocery store but didn’t find the shallots in their usual place, tucked in between the red onions and the garlic. I took a second lap around the store to see if I’d missed them.

In between our casual conversation, his mother would tell him to calm down or behave in the cart, but as time went on, staying calm and behaving became more difficult for this three-year-old boy. She used her most firm disciplinary voice while she cleaned the sticky mess. “See what you’ve done? This is why I told you to behave. You weren’t listening and now we have this big mess and no shallots. Now we’re not going to get ice cream after the store because you didn’t behave.”

His mother turned around at that time. “Are you talking about me?” He stared straight into her eyes, neither confirming nor denying that he’d tried to get me in his corner. Every child needs to feel like they have a village, too. Someone who’s in their corner, on their team. They are constantly searching out teachers, parents of their friends, coaches, and instructors to see who is in their village. As they go to school, they scan the crowd of kids to see who might be a good village member.

 

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