It’s a Great Time to Elope

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Instead of sending out a card informing your attendees of an impending new wedding date, how about a card saying “WE ELOPED!”?

Illustration: By Stevie Remsberg Some people spend their whole lives imagining their wedding day. A room filled with family and friends, all gathered to usher them into their next phase in life. A celebration of love and joy. Fancy clothes, fresh flowers, a dance floor. A bunch of big, round tables and a dinner choice of meat, fish, or vegetarian. You and your beloved saying hello to every guest and then almost immediately saying, “Well, we have to go make the rounds!” It’s a lovely scene.

I understand this guilt and imagine I’ll succumb to it myself if Domhnall Gleeson ever responds to my marriage proposal. But you, “lucky” you, have an excuse to break it. According to a survey from wedding-planning website the Knot, the average amount spent on weddings nationally in 2019 was $33,900. Whether this was ever a good amount to spend on a party is up for debate, but with the country sliding toward a new Great Depression, I think the amount would now give pause to even the comfortably wealthy among us.

 

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