Is “Compersion” the Opposite of Jealousy?

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What we can learn from people in open relationships about feeling happy for our partner's successes

Rather than feeling jealousy in a situation like Scenario 2, they experience an emotion known as “compersion.” This is the joyful feeling of knowing an important person in your life is experiencingPeople who practice CNM report that they feel compersion for their partner’s other intimate relationships. In fact, the term is mainly used within the context of extramarital intimacies.

Balzarini and colleagues argue that emotional ambivalence is quite common in social situations. Take Shakespeare’s famous line from Romeo and Juliet: “Parting is such sweet sorrow.” In this case, two lovers are saying goodnight, sad that they’re leaving each other for now but happily looking forward to meeting again the next day.

We experience bittersweet emotions in many other social situations as well. For instance, you’ll likely feel this way when a good friend moves away for a new career opportunity. And parents experience it repeatedly as their children establish new levels of independence.Balzarini and colleagues note that CNM couples can experience both compersion and jealousy when their partner takes on a new lover.

 

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Something that doesn't seem to get talked about often I this kind of research, is that many of the difficulties arising in non monogamous relationship have very little to do with jealousy but lots to do with social status or social comparison....

Well, that about ends dating for me. Hard pass on the open relationship thing. Why don't we just gather for the orgy porgy and have facilities where kids are told to fondle each other. I didn't care for Brave New World as a kid and I'm not liking it now.

why do you suppose that that later evoked a largely and consistently similar negative response across most cultures?

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