ICE Sends Agents Home With Sacks Of Flour To Practice What It Like Detaining Real Baby
WASHINGTON—In an effort to prepare officers for upcoming nationwide raids on undocumented immigrants, ICE officials announced Thursday that they would be sending agents home with sacks of flour to practice detaining real babies. “Providing each immigration agent with a 5-pound bag of flour to take home will give them hands-on experience prior to separating real infants from their families this weekend,” said ICE director Thomas Homan, noting that the bags of flour are roughly the same size and weight of a real baby that they will be ripping from their mother’s arms when the no-tolerance crackdown on immigrants in the U.S. begins Sunday. “We want our officers to know what to expect when they’re expecting to apprehend a baby—it isn’t as easy as it looks. You have to know how to identify them, process them, and hold their heads as you carry them into a cell. Practicing on a sack of flour first will help them learn the skills. We’re also encouraging agents to draw terrified, crying faces on the sacks of flour as a fun, creative way to make the experience more realistic.” At press time, several officers had to be issued a second sack of flour after their first one broke open while they practiced throwing them into cages.Read more: The Onion
where was all this faux outrage during obama's presidency? SirLarr When did stop doing satire news story's? 😂😂 the worst part of this story is The Onion photo shopped the baby out of the picture , just shocking What kind of kool-aid they serving? 🙄 M you b Bags of flour?er okay. Then kick it around like a soccer ball for extra Immersion
The tea’s extra hot today☕️ Jesus, that is a deep cut Wow, thats ICE cold!
Mass immigration roundups in U.S. to start Sunday: New York TimesThe raids will be conducted by Immigration and Customs Enforcement ( ICE ) agents over a number of days starting July 14, the Times reported citing unnamed sources including two current and one former homeland security officials. The officials told the Times that ICE agents were targeting at least 2,000 Finally!
In related news, Dems deny funds to aid ICE in buying flour, thus making the problem worse. Too bad the agents overseeing the hundreds of thousands of detainees under the Obama reign didn't receive the same training. Maybe more of them would have lived. spoof Onion Offices will be moved to India to see what insane over population looks like. After a 10 year tour they can try and 'immigrate' back.
It's probably true. They tried eggs but they made too many omelettes. Satire that’s so brutally honest it’ll make ya cry. 😢 And yet they can’t keep the real kids alive despite this training. I bet they were really delicate with those bags of white flour. with TrumpFascism, anything can happen.AmericanFascism: disdain for HumanRights; unceasing propaganda;rampant sexism; governing by CORRUPTION; control MSM; Fraudulent Elections; disdain for education & science; Nationalism; religion & government intertwined; Hate.
NPR Choice pageGreat idea. AbolishICE This ain’t it. By doing this, they’re encouraging people to drive w/o a license. ICEgov you guys do a good job overall, but you have a lot of bad policies to throw out & a lot of bad eggs to fire.
We get it, you're a Democrat publication. 👏👏👏👏👏👏 It's* OnAFoldDraw That’s a joke from the Onion, I’m sure u know lol Do you really need practice for choking and tasing a child? Come up with better shit ICEKills Omg 🤣😳😢🙄 I hope they use gloves, you gotta be careful with the wheat germs.
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UncleChaps 👀 But in a practice scenario, he doesn't cry every two hours and constantly drool everywhere... ...I'm talking about the ICE agent... What are we doing. 'Huh, Kinda like these migrants, it makes bomb ass food, yo' ComradeSagan And sacks of flour don't need toothpaste.....Ah, now it makes sense.
But the ICE agents I see in S.D. are Hispanic FatVeganCommie Keepin it real 🚼🚱☢🚾 I thought this was supposed to be satire? meh... Nice. Some jokes are worth Eternal Damnation.
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The Flour Child too soon... too soon...
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