‘I’m Free, I’m Finally Free!’ Thinks Parent Before Realizing Lost Child Just Hiding Inside Clothes Rack
KENOSHA, WI—Exulting with joy as she kicked over an empty stroller, mother Michelle Groves, 34, was observed saying “I’m free, I’m finally free” to herself and several onlookers in Target Wednesday, moments before realizing her child was simply hiding inside a nearby clothing rack. “At last I’ve cast off my burden! The great weight is lifted!” said Groves in a burst of sudden elation, before going on to piece her life’s ambitions back together and calculate the money she and her husband were about to save. “Dave and I could go on a trip together! Maybe fall in love again! Or…Or I could leave him! Go back to school! My life is mine again! Mine! My living nightmare is over!” Eyewitnesses report the laughing, dancing Groves stopped dead in her tracks and began to weep silently when the sound of her daughter’s giggles came from the center of a circular rack of discount jeans.Advertisement Read more: The Onion
I love it bClickClack I hid in a clothes rack at a Beano's in san diego when I was a kid and I was so excited from the thrill of being found at any moment that I barfed up an entire orange soda while standing hunched over in a mass of paisley turtleneck bodysuits Awh Ahhh, too bad.
Get free pancakes Tuesday for IHOP National Pancake Day and enter 'Pancakes for Life' contestIHOP's Pancake Day freebie giveaway is Tuesday, which is Shrove Tuesday. Get free pancakes and enter the restaurant's 'Pancakes for Life' contest. Oprah Winfrey: you want a pancake?! you want a pancake?! You all get pancakes!
This Workwear Company Will Provide Free Clothing to Any Woman Running for Public OfficeM.M.LaFleur Pledges to Provide Free Clothing to Any Woman Running for Public Office While you fire women if they come forward with allegations against powerful men who will smear their character. Good, now they can actually teach some of the conservative Republican women how to actually dress! Instead of a lot of them looking like they should be on an episode of What Not To Wear! A total what not to wear moment! You fired a rape victim for public ally talking about it and now you’re flooding your feed so you can push that story away.
Demi Lovato Goes Makeup-Free in Glowing Bareface Selfie, Says She's 'Proud of My Booty Chin'The singer shares her first fresh-faced photo in 'years' to show fans what she looks like '85%-90% of the time'
How Sanders would provide free child care and early education for allSanders and his campaign say the plan offers up free, full-day child care for every child from infancy, plus pre-K to every child in the country, starting at age 3. “A government big enough to give you everything you want, is a government big enough to take away everything that you have.' Thomas Jefferson With Bernie, everything is “free” except the American citizens. He can say whatever he wants....none of these will ever pass Congress and Senate.....(maybe Cuba will pay for it....) The issue is where are we going to get all the trained and qualified workers to provide these services, to to include the lack of certified facilities to provide the care. It takes a minimum of 10 years to train a doctor. Even a daycare worker will need a year of training.
Surprise, Luxury Hotels Are Struggling to Rein in Influencers Who Want Everything for FreeBack in 2018, my colleague Megan Reynolds wrote a blog about the Instagram influencers who routinely bombard luxury resorts with ridiculous requests to finagle their way into free room and board... in exchange for glowing posts, of course. Many of those requests came from people who aren’t even influencers—randos with 2,000 Instagram followers, demanding a fully-comped, week-long stay at a five-star hotel in, like, the Maldives. To counteract the influx of opportunistic “influencers,” or so it seems, some luxury hotels have begun to use formal screening processes to hand-select the social media users who get to stay in their lavish rooms for free. Guess social media celebrities haven’t lost their ability to leech off brands. I say more power to ‘em.\n Rein GreatDismal Useless creatures. GreatDismal Reign: rule Rein: whoa Rain: weather Rainn: Wilson thank you
Super-high heels free women, says shoe king LouboutinSuper-high heels can free women, says legendary French shoe designer Christian Louboutin, who insists that wearing his towering six-inch stilettos is a "form of liberty". While some feminists see vertiginous heels as sexual enslavement, Louboutin believes the opposite -- even if it means women AFP Much like foot-binding did in China. 🤨 AFP frees a woman up to a broken ankle or two. And that’s why he wears them all the time, right? (Doubtful)