How to Get Your Partner to Open Up to You

Strategies to help you create more open communication and emotional intimacy.

6/14/2021 8:32:00 PM

Does your partner avoid being emotionally vulnerable with you? Here are 5 things you can do, writes AHSolomon

Strategies to help you create more open communication and emotional intimacy.

over the last 25 years. Constraint questions:Plant the seed of possibility that things can be different by creating a hopeful frame around the problem.Focus us on what is blocking the healthy response. Once we know what is blocking the “solution” (here, opening up) we can start to work on lifting that constraint.

Florida breaks record with more than 21,000 new COVID cases BTS' RM Says Working on 'Permission to Dance' Didn't Give Him Stress Like 'Butter' Did Daughter of President Lyndon Baines Johnson says her father would have stood with Texas voting rights advocates

Reflect on the question: “What is keeping my partner from opening up to me?” If you want “extra credit” you can ask your partner this question directly. Some common constraints to emotional vulnerability that I see in my work include:GenderRole Socialization:

If your partner has been socialized in the masculine, he learned early on to associate emotional vulnerability with weakness. He was told implicitly and explicitly to keep a stiff upper lip, to keep his guard up, and certainly to never, ever cry. His intimate relationship with you may be the first and only place he ever opens up. While the amount he opens up may feel only an inch deep to you, to him, it may feel as deep as the ocean because it stands in stark contrast to his other relational experiences. This is not an excuse. It is a context. I want men’s partners to expect the depth and tenderness that foster intimacy because I have seen men grow into this ability. I just also want men’s partners to practice patience. What may feel like resistance is more likely inexperience.

Family of Origin Dynamics:If your partner is from a family that didn’t “do feelings,” these muscles never developed. Again, not an excuse, but a context. What you are wanting and needing is in direct contrast with your partner’s prior experiences.Marginalized Identities:

If your partner occupies one or more marginalized identities, they may well have had times when their vulnerable self-disclosures were dismissed, disbelieved, or used against them. Becoming self-protective may well be a survival strategy that helps them navigate the ways in which the wind is at their face.

Read more: Psychology Today »

Jeff Bezos' spaceflight: Live updates

Jeff Bezos will fly to space today on the first crewed flight of the New Shepard, the rocket ship made by his space company, Blue Origin. Follow here for live updates.

Better than pizza delivery? Khachapuri to your doorEven as restaurants fully reopen, I'll also keep covering pop-ups. A First Wave-The Emergence. A pandemic romance. Shelby Stone travels the world chasing the virus that threatens life and love. Ebook/paperback selling worldwide afirstwave COVID lisamariemeadows love authors writers pandemic romance afw worldwide

This mezcal is a Mexican-French hybridMezcal sales are expected to nearly double over the coming years, going from $326 million in 2019 to a predicted $521 million in 2027. Here's one to consider: This 'rosé' mezcal takes its inspiration from French wine. Elon musk secret to success via YouTube ... I need this

Op-Ed: Tap the state's future surpluses to give everyone a share in California's wealthOp-Ed: Tap the state's future surpluses to give everyone a share in California's wealth (via latimesopinion) opinion 'future surpluses' opinion I need to get a message to Governor Newsom’s Nephew it’s very important

The Pink Tax: what you need to knowAnd why women are still getting the raw end of the deal in 2021

Welcome to ‘The Church of Ziwe’Talking with ziwe about her new show, getting into character, and her ambitions ('world domination')

Ewan McGregor's Daughter Clara Walks Red Carpet With Dog Bite Wounds'When a dog bite lands you in the ER 30 mins before the red carpet😅' PrayingForYourSpeedyRecovery RicardoAJenkins