How the Holidays Leave the Estranged Out in the Cold

Those in fractured families often dread Christmas hype and the long, melancholy season that they may spend alone.

Lowering expectations and reframing the holiday experience can help the estranged cope with end-of-year blues.TheHere it comes again: Norman Rockwell’s romanticized portrait of the ideal American family. Eleven people spanning three generations, seated around the Thanksgiving table, beaming at one another and at a bounteous spread of food.

During the years when I was estranged from my only brother, I struggled to get through the holidays. From the lavish downtown decorations to the local grocery store’s tinsel, every bright, jingling holiday display reminded me of the “happy family” I was missing. Things seemed to get worse every year, with retailers nudging profits forward until candy canes jumped Halloween altogether and began popping up as part of back-to-school sales.

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