How Partners Can Cheat Without Cheating

defines it as “small things you do that could have whispers of infidelity—without actually being physically unfaithful.

All of this is subjective, of course, depending on the couple and the relationship boundaries they’ve agreed upon. This means that some behaviors might feel like full-blown infidelity for one couple, micro-cheating for another, and not cheating at all for another. For example, some couples might feel that using porn while away on a business trip counts as full-blown infidelity, another couple might view it as micro-cheating, and yet another couple might not think it is problematic at all.

I do think it’s important to point out here that much of what most people consider micro-cheating is relatively normal behavior both in and out of a relationship. If you see someone that you find attractive and that person smiles at you, you’re probably going to return that with your own best smile, regardless of your relationship status.

from people other than our primary partner. And the fact that we respond in kind when someone blatantly flirts with us is not a reflection of the strength and quality of our primary relationship.a regular basis, that might elevate the behavior to the level of full-blown cheating. The fact that any one instance would not be deeply upsetting to the betrayed partner does not stop a series of micro-cheating behaviors from adding up and heightening the impact.

At the end of the day, how a couple defines and reacts to both cheating and micro-cheating depends on the couple. If there is disagreement about what does and does not constitute cheating and/or micro-cheating in a relationship, the best way to resolve this conflict and ultimately strengthen the relationship is to engage in open and honest communication. This can occur with or without the assistance of a therapist.

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