I’m currently home visiting my parents, brother, and grandmother for the next six weeks, in my first visit in a year. About a year and a half ago, my parents moved back to their hometown, where they purchased and are renovating my mother’s childhood home, where my 84-year-old grandmother still lives. Amid the home improvements, they’ve been shocked to realize the amount of caretaking my grandmother is in need of, having lived out of state until now.
Your first priority should be to get your grandmother evaluated by her doctor, because there are any number of conditions that could be underlying her incontinence and confusion, some of which might require immediate medical attention, and some of which might respond well to medical treatment. If she has yet to see a medical professional, schedule an appointment with a primary care physician immediately—it’s imperative you don’t just assume her decline is probably dementia.
Though assisted living facilities and home health aides may not be ideal situations during the pandemic, they’re worth researching now, and finding out what coronavirus protocols they follow. It may simply be best for your grandmother to get outside help, regardless of the pandemic. If nothing else, you’ll be ready to go when the pandemic subsides. If you need additional support in the meantime, contact your local department on aging.
We don’t have much of a support system in our current city. I don’t know if she is well enough to travel to her parents’ place. I am Sally’s sole advocate with physicians and social services providers who often disbelieve her. Since her illness, she has frequently told me she “doesn’t know what she would do without me.” Please help. I am at my breaking point and have no idea what to do.
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