Having A Messy House Doesn’t Make Me A Bad Person ― Or A Bad Mom

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'Being messy isn’t a character failing.'

I have had several sink issues over the years. Mostly flies. Fruit flies, drain flies, gnats ― it’s unclear what specific infestation of little winged creatures have taken over my sink area, but the cause was evident: the dirty dishes I’d left stacked there for weeks at a time. I once looked inside a pasta sauce-encrusted pot to see it teeming with wriggling white maggots, a detail so disgusting I hesitate to share it in publication.

But even in sobriety, I have always had a hard time with domestic duties. I’m the poster child for adult attention deficit disorder, which I was finally diagnosed with at age 30, and let me tell you now thatcomes in mighty handy when it comes to household maintenance. When I look at a messy room, my focus is pulled in 50 different directions.

When COVID hit and we were suddenly confined to our homes, my already iffy housekeeping skills took a hit. My son and I were suddenly generating more garbage, dirty dishes and clutter than ever. In my early efforts to excel at pandemic momming, ongoing Lego projects with hundreds of tiny pieces took over the living room floor and goopy science projects dripped everywhere. The laundromat shut down and our dirty clothes piled up.

 

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