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Feeling Too Schlubby to Have Sex? It’s Not Just You.

Sexual desire is lower than it’s been at any point during the pandemic for people who are feeling stressed, a new study says. To rekindle a relationship, sex therapists advise to just start touching.

10/20/2021 4:00:00 AM

Sexual desire is lower than it’s been at any point during the pandemic for people who are feeling stressed, a new study says. To rekindle your relationship, sex therapists advise to just start touching.

Sexual desire is lower than it’s been at any point during the pandemic for people who are feeling stressed, a new study says. To rekindle a relationship, sex therapists advise to just start touching.

Oct. 19, 2021 9:47 am ETOne evening while watching Netflix with her husband, Nicole Katsulis worked up her nerve and asked him something terrifying: “Why don’t you want to have sex with me?”Ms. Katsulis, a teacher, knewher body had changedduring the pandemic. She’d had a baby right before it started, then spent months snacking while working from home. Countless nights snuggled with her family in front of the TV bingeing on chips and cookies had also taken their toll. Now, she worried that she no longer turned her husband on.

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“I’d gotten bigger and softer,” says the 34-year-old from Petaluma, Calif. “I wasn’t feeling sexy.”She’s not the only one.Sexual desire, or interest in having sex, is lower than it’s been at any point during the pandemic forpeople who are feeling stressed

, according to a new study led by researchers at Texas State University and the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University, under peer review for the journal “Archives of Sexual Behavior.” The pandemic buzzkills of fear, worry, loneliness and boredom continue to take their toll. And the more distress people report they have, the less sexual desire for their partner they say they feel. headtopics.com

Now, therapists and sex researchers believe there’s another pandemic problem that’s affecting couple’s sex lives.“They’re feeling really schlubby,” says Rhonda Balzarini, an assistant professor of psychology at Texas State and affiliate member at the Kinsey Institute, who was the lead author of the recent study. They’re chubbier and generally unkempt. “That makes them feel less attractive and, therefore, less desirable,” she adds.

SHARE YOUR THOUGHTSHow do you keep the spark alive in your relationship? Join the conversation below.Blame it on a sense of malaise brought on by stress, Dr. Balzarini says. Yes, gyms and salons were closed for a time, and many people weren’t comfortable going when they did reopen due to safety concerns. But research shows that many people are feeling low or depressed. This sapped their energy. They didn’t work out at home. They let their grooming go. And they tried to cheer themselves up by overeating and,

in some cases, overdrinking. “It’s like a stress spillover,” Dr. Balzarini says.Research shows that when we feel bad about our bodies, we feel less sexual desire and less satisfaction. This is true for men and women. Even thinking about how someone else may negatively assess our body can decrease our own desire. And feeling bad about our body during a sexual encounter can lead to decreased satisfaction.

“Body image has a powerful impact on our sexuality,” says Robin Milhausen, professor in the department of Family Relations and Applied Nutrition at the University of Guelph, in Ontario, Canada, who studies this issue. “And we’re our own harshest critics.” headtopics.com

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In reporting this story, I found people dodging their partner’s overtures, hiding under the covers during sex and faking headaches and backaches, all because they felt schlubby.“‘At this point in the pandemic, I’m out of breath just rolling over on the sofa watching TV.’

”— A writer in Southern CaliforniaA business owner in Los Angeles who gained 20 pounds during the pandemic says she tries never to be naked in front of her boyfriend—going to bed before he does, showering in a different bathroom, and “praying that he’ll get out of bed first thing in the morning so I can dodge another bullet.”

A realtor in Pittsburgh suggested to his husband that they start sleeping in separate bedrooms, “just like the royals,” so he could avoid being intimate.A mom in Philadelphia says she feels disgusted with her husband when he tries to get things going in the bedroom. “It’s like, ‘What’s wrong with him, I’m gross!’ ” she says. A writer in Southern California says that when his couples therapist gave him a worksheet on how to spice things up in the bedroom, titled “The Sensual Journey: Seven Exercises for Creative Intimacy,” a feeling of dread washed over him. “At this point in the pandemic, I’m out of breath just rolling over on the sofa watching TV,” he says.

So, how can you jump-start your libido?The experts are clear: Start touching. Read more: The Wall Street Journal »

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Just wear a mask and stay 6 feet apart! Speak for yourself..... I guess they have not seen my onlyfans cheap subscription hot videos and sexy pictures my wife has been gardening a lot? drink a glass of water on an empty stomach every day but avoid eating or drinking anything for around 45 minutes. not mine. gotta have a good wife who you truly love.

The flu has caused the global economy to retreat, and the money in our hands is constantly depreciating. Who stole our wealth? I think this is a question worth thinking about. Touch me… thanks Porn?

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Yeah, it's the 'flu' that's bringing out the best in people. Gosh, it'd better be, especially your soldiers who have consistently raped around the world when they are sent out to kill, since the two world wars. Come on guys, don't lie about it, they behaved worse than animals. Where do they come up with that? I bet the stats on some websites have thrived throughout the pandemic 😷

I don't think so 😆 Lan asıl sıkıntı bu kadar stresin içinde siki kendiliğinden kalkanlarda aga. Which is ironic because sex is great for stress relief. Maybe yours, brother... Is this really a worthwhile story, that people don't wana ****.

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Don't touch me My wife left me after reading this today now do it in other languages It would help if we knew why testosterone levels have drastically declined the last 40yrs. Since this is a Rupert Murdoc publication, let’s clarify that it’s not unwanted touching you’re talking about- we don’t want to empower any more Harvey Weinstein’s.

😂🤣🤣 claro , es un portal del norte .🤣🤣🤣😂 Never in my entire life would I have expected to encounter a word like “Schlubby”, especially when it's being used by a big-name news outlet. To start touching what? That’s advice for women. Men are ready,locked and loaded, every minute of every day; pandemic, earthquake, famine. No matter.

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..and in case of no one to touch? Anyone in particular? Yup. Stressing about those 30lbs you put on. Good theory Touching…who, exactly? Come on. You gotta be specific. nwo call it immune compromise when nwo fake vaccines fail to stop coronas breaking through like nwo do to butt holes to taste nwo loyalty Hate that f'in pumpkin mustard shit color they're pushing this season. Black people look good in it, almost no one else does.

I've learnt a lot from a mentor who were instrumentally in shape with me, and I want to share what I've learnt. Investing with you has changed my life Geoffreypreud That's why Onlyfans has turned an entire generation in to prostitutes right? Oh wait...I guess that just has them singing that I Touch Myself song from the 90s

Not sure about this.

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wow And for gdsake-- put away the fucking phones while talking to each other. Thank you, Wall Street Journal 😵‍💫 just when I'm about to hit the town... Down with that sort of thing ... Eye roll It's a bit odd for the WSJ to run a story on failing sexual desire. Ya'll won 🤣🤣 I think the first step is actually to ask for consent wsjsupportsunwantedtouching

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