Emily Oster Thinks of Herself As an Expert on Data in Parenting, Not Parenting

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“All you can do is try to make the best ex ante decision. You can never know if you made the best ex post decision. Stuff happens. I think that’s hard because we want to make the decision that’s right, but can’t know if it’s right,” says ProfEmilyOster

Illustration: Lauren Tamaki Emily Oster, Ph.D, is an economist at Brown University and the author of two best-selling books on pregnancy and parenting, Expecting Better and Cribsheet, a subject she also explores in her twice-weekly newsletter, ParentData. Her third book, The Family Firm , is about parental decision-making in a child’s early school years.

I drink coffee, look at my email, sometimes I do a little bit of writing. I make the kids’ and my lunches, and then I go running. [For lunch], the kids typically get a sandwich, a piece of fruit, a container of vegetables, and a cookie. The vegetables are a bit of a farce these days, actually, but I keep trying. I feel like it’s important to try.

The kids get up around seven, and then we have breakfast together. They’re supposed to get their own breakfast, which works better in the summer when there’s more time. Camp doesn’t start until later, so after breakfast there’s some educational enrichment that they practice or violin. In the summer, [mornings] are quite nice because there’s a fair amount of flexibility. There’s actually a lot of time to do stuff and not be stressed out.

I used to have a more structured work schedule. I think in my ideal world, it would be, “On these days of the week, I work on this task.” Earlier in my career I did more of that, where I worked in blocks of time, or, “We’re gonna sprint on this project,” where we would have some plan in advance. In the current moment, that has gone by the wayside, but I’m always trying to re-create that every week. But in fact, it’s just things coming up and then I have to fix them.

At nine o’clock, I talk to my husband for 45 minutes. We’ll just hang out in the kitchen, empty the dishwasher, and talk to each other. Then I usually read, or sometimes I watch a little bit of TV. You’re not supposed to use screens before bed, but I’m so tired all the time it doesn’t matter. I like a good crappy reality show like Real Housewives. We go to bed at ten.

 

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