Eagles Fan Starts Tailgating At 9 A.M. For Custody Hearing

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PHILADELPHIA—Cracking open a Coors Light as he lit his charcoal grill, Eagles fan Anthony Marcus reportedly started tailgating at 9 a.m. Thursday ahead of the custody hearing for his 8-month-old daughter. “I always like to get together with the boys and throw back a few cold ones before the afternoon trial starts,” said Marcus, pointing toward a crowded section of the parking lot off the side of the courthouse as a “good spot to piss without getting caught.” “It sucks because they don’t let you drink in there anymore, but I’ll try to sneak a beer past security. We’ve got some really good wings my man Blake brings, and Johnny has a public intoxication hearing at the same time, so why not make a day of it? It’s good to let off some steam here, ’cause I got kicked out last week for calling the judge a ‘Homo.’ Fucking pussies.” At press time, Marcus was frantically cleaning vomit off his “good” Carson Wentz jersey before heading into trial.

PHILADELPHIA—Cracking open a Coors Light as he lit his charcoal grill, Eagles fan Anthony Marcus reportedly started tailgating at 9 a.m. Thursday ahead of the custody hearing for his 8-month-old daughter. “I always like to get together with the boys and throw back a few cold ones before the afternoon trial starts,” said Marcus, pointing toward a crowded section of the parking lot off the side of the courthouse as a “good spot to piss without getting caught.

cause I got kicked out last week for calling the judge a ‘Homo.’ Fucking pussies.” At press time, Marcus was frantically cleaning vomit off his “good” Carson Wentz jersey before heading into trial.

 

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Cc: RMcElhenney ClapClapCaw

Oh snap!

go birds

Henderson1983

Art.

YeahImJeffEck

Selfish bastard didn’t bring enough beer for kiddies though

No respectable judge would ever grant custody to an Eagles fan.

Go Birds

CC: Alexholva kpetro23 Olindodoe 😂😂

cemeteryxhate

Ideapath

go birds go birds go birds

Go birds!

J_Hermy

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