Dear Prudence Uncensored: “Ugly Duckling”

I’m very nosy and LOVE people-watching, and I honestly can’t remember ever being like, “HOLY SHIT! OH, NO! ATTRACTIVENESS MISMATCH!” and not being able to control my face.Right! I mean, I love gossiping with my friends about strangers we see in public as much as the next person, but I would bet that one out of every thousand people we discuss or comment on in public will be able to adequately read my and my friends’ lips to discern what we’re saying.

It makes no sense to restructure your life based on the random assumptions made by people like me in passing!No, but I’m incredibly oblivious. Like I grew up biracial with a white mother in a white community, and she says people stared at us alllll the time and still do and I have never noticed at all. I do kind of think if you are looking for people to be staring at you, you are staring at them, and eventually you’re going to catch each other.

Another thought I had: I wonder if LW is actually just uncomfortable BEING in this relationship, but is making it about strangers’ reactions because that’s an easier target to get upset about, compared to “I feel undeserving of this love and uneasy.”That’s a good point about accidentally catching someone’s eye. I do think my girlfriend and I have had that happen to us because we really enjoy seeing other queer couples out and about in the city.

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