Dear Evan Hansen, This Is a Restraining Order

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Dear Evan Hansen, this is a restraining order. JacobOller's review of a ghoulish musical failure:

You should never pity a movie. Not even a desperately misguided movie. Not even if it’s about a depressed kid that capitalizes on the suicide of another student, and is based on a Broadway show with the same subject matter, with songwriter Benj Pasek originally taking inspiration from the, but movies are too calculated and take too much work to really ever deserve or merit pity.

You know the annoying trope where the only reason a plot exists is because an ineffectual character can’t— uh— won’t— quite manage to— oh gosh I simply couldn’t— just get the goddamn truth out? Imagine that being the basis not for avoidable romantic misunderstanding, but for preying on a grieving community. And it’s all painstakingly excused by Evan’s mental illness, explaining away what’s clearly a cold-blooded psychological thriller masquerading as a morbid high school musical.

While he certainly doesn’t prove that people in their 20s should never play high schoolers, Platt and everything the film does to de-age him is distracting at best and nightmarish at worst. Platt never looks like a high schooler as much as Fred Armison nervously vamping in an “It’s Pat!” wig and pancake make-up so intense Dean Stockwell’scharacter would scoff. The closeness and brightness of it all only makes him look more like a Muppet accountant.

He does come back for one amusing scene, however. The film is mostly humorless , with thankless sassy gay best friend stereotype Jared saddled with the sole eye-rolling comic relief, but Colton Ryan milks his morbid part in the movie’s best number, “Sincerely Me.”’s sole instance of physical energy and amusing filmmaking reanimates Connor for a dance routine about how he and Evan aregay—and it’s the closest the movie ever gets to self-awareness of its characters’ vapidity.

 

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JacobOller Haven’t seen it and won’t see it, but thanks for the thoughtful review.

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