NEW YORK—Devoting thousands of words to what he called “one of the major issues facing Americans today,”op-ed writer David Brooks decried what he viewed as the incivility of modern plumbing Wednesday after tripping on his own feet and falling headfirst into a toilet.
“I was struck recently by an oft-endured but rarely discussed cruelty of our current era, as an innocuous attempt to relieve myself quickly spiraled into a saga of pain, embarrassment, and regret,” said the celebrated columnist and bestselling author of, detailing how he had come to understand the coarse and barbaric nature of the widespread fluid-conveyance system after careening into the bathroom and landing with his face planted squarely in the toilet bowl, where he then struggled vainly for...
should decry feet
Did Mark Shields push him?
If only
But he remains undaunted and declares that he is optimistic that there is still enough good plumbing remaining in the heartland to spark a conservative revival.
If it had been Paul Krugman, he would have published a FRED chart showing seasonally adjusted toilet injuries.
nytdavidbrooks you’ve officially made it big if you have an entire article written about you. Congrats!
WC Culture run amok
Very Serious People
Never seen a self swirlie before.
More people die from toilet related deaths than shark related deaths
It's time to return to the good old days when we would dig latrine pits that our entire bodies would fall into when we use it at night because it was too dark to see.
its wet.
Swirly x100
If only...
Mr_Electrico
After being subjected to a merciless hour long swirly courtesy of Mitch McConnell Brooks declares congress broken
darksoulstoilet Poor unfortunate Undead, fell victim to a Bonfire Mimic.
Sick dance moves!
athenogenes nytdavidbrooks Here's hoping this is one of the ones that comes true!
nytdavidbrooks Chaos reigns
nytdavidbrooks instantposts
nytdavidbrooks He was tripping on feet? How long did it take to kick-in?
nytdavidbrooks (INVOLUNTARY COARSE, JEERING, PARTISAN GUFFAW! HAW! HAW!)
nytdavidbrooks Obviously not a golfer.
nytdavidbrooks
nytdavidbrooks Is this Elton John
nytdavidbrooks That's a wicked tricky yoga move
nytdavidbrooks Fanfic
nytdavidbrooks Lectures the sink on humility after he thought he heard it laughing at him.
nytdavidbrooks Mr_Electrico
nytdavidbrooks Again.?!?!
nytdavidbrooks David needs practice.
nytdavidbrooks ‘It’s bidet, not a drinking fountain....’ 🙄
nytdavidbrooks I really want to know what that photo shoot was like
nytdavidbrooks Hope he warned Bret Stephens about this.
nytdavidbrooks modern plumbing became uncivil, particularly as it applies to the toilet b/c of humans' insistence on sitting on that fixture for hours on end browsing and using social media on their smartphones. truestory
nytdavidbrooks Today it's a toilet, tomorrow it might be a brick or worse (We can only hope)
nytdavidbrooks We can only hope.
nytdavidbrooks Oooh! Been there!
nytdavidbrooks mollyknefel are you moonlighting at the onion?
nytdavidbrooks You accidentally ran real news again.
nytdavidbrooks Finally a Game of Thrones ending we can all live with!
nytdavidbrooks
nytdavidbrooks May the cynical prick never become unstuck from this position.
nytdavidbrooks It won't stop flushing!
nytdavidbrooks Enjoy the waterworks man
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