Vol 56 Issue 26, Business, Workplace

Vol 56 Issue 26, Business

CEO Likes To Think Of Company As One Big Manson Family

CEO Likes To Think Of Company As One Big Manson Family

6/30/2020 7:29:00 PM

CEO Likes To Think Of Company As One Big Manson Family

NEW YORK—Expressing his affection for the close-knit community he’d helped foster, CEO Tony Vanders of regional communications Vandcorp Media told reporters Tuesday that he has always thought of his company as one big Manson family. “I know it’s something of a cliché, but I honestly consider my employees to be close, tightly knit, utterly devoted cadre of loyal followers who take my every word as absolute authority,” said the executive, claiming the bonds he shared with his workers weren’t unlike those of a fanatical commune of brainwashed zealots. “We’ve got all the typical Manson Family dynamics. I’m the paternal figure who keeps his subordinates in a stupor of exhaustion and confusion in order to make them particularly malleable to his twisted whims. Alice Fendelman is our parallel to Squeaky Fromme, who uses the pretense of taking care of the family members to ensure no one acts against the family interests—naturally, she’s our HR director. As for the rest, I have no doubt they’d kill for me if asked, seeing as I stripped them of their individual humanity long ago.” Vanders added that he originally started his company to punish his underlings and the world at large for his lack of artistic success.\n

NEW YORK—Expressing his affection for the close-knit community he’d helped foster, CEO Tony Vanders of regional communications Vandcorp Media told reporters Tuesday that he has always thought of his company as one big Manson family. “I know it’s something of a cliché, but I honestly consider my employees to be close, tightly knit, utterly devoted cadre of loyal followers who take my every word as absolute authority,” said the executive, claiming the bonds he shared with his workers weren’t unlike those of a fanatical commune of brainwashed zealots. “We’ve got all the typical Manson Family dynamics. I’m the paternal figure who keeps his subordinates in a stupor of exhaustion and confusion in order to make them particularly malleable to his twisted whims. Alice Fendelman is our parallel to Squeaky Fromme, who uses the pretense of taking care of the family members to ensure no one acts against the family interests—naturally, she’s our HR director. As for the rest, I have no doubt they’d kill for me if asked, seeing as I stripped them of their individual humanity long ago.” Vanders added that he originally started his company to punish his underlings and the world at large for his lack of artistic success.

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You lookin at me? You lookin at - - - - Uhoh Why does he somehow look like both an old man AND a young woman? Holy shit Is that a picture of Pharma Bro Martin Shkreil using a photo aging app? Uuuuuuhhhhhhh yogthos except in reality the CEO would be 30 years younger and wearing a tshirt This is great. But you mis-spelled the name of the company I just quit. And the part about the CEO leaving intimidating messages on your voicemail. 'I don't feel like you're all in'.

why do his eyes look like a bad video game rendering. Same energy I worked for a similar company! RebeuSoinn Usually the headline carries the bit - it's the photo here. Let me guess, is that Judge Doom's brother? Haha whatever subtle edit to his eyes you did there is good. This guy looks AI generated Jesus christ

CEO = cross eyed ostrich This is so so disturbing. The image Scared me! When will the CEOs solo album with unintelligible lyrics come out? Ok, but what kind of healthcare are they offering? Why is this image so disturbing? Unfree thinkers. His eyes. Oh my beloved Onion...what happened? the man... he puts fear in me

This guy has one eye looking to Jesus and one eye looking for rattlesnakes.

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Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg net worth and how he spends his wealth - Business InsiderBusiness Insider is a fast-growing business site with deep financial, media, tech, and other industry verticals. Launched in 2007, the site is now the largest business news site on the web. YIKES 😂 BoycottFacebook Byyyyyeeee Zuck Facebook

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Nissan CEO repeats pledge to step down if he fails to deliver recoveryNissan Motor Co Chief Executive Makoto Uchida told shareholders on Monday that he would stick to his promise to step down as leader if he fails to deliver on his turnaround plan for the Japanese automaker. That...is...hard as Fuk He should step down now since no one can fix NIssan now. Nissan is a terminal cancer patient. E só chamar um brasileiro exilado no libano que ele resolve novamente a insolvência financeira ...😂😂😂