Being Embarrassed Is Good, Actually

. “The factors that are most important are us breaking that script, us feeling like others have seen us breaking that script. Most people have a natural inclination to follow the rules and norms of the society they live in. So, any sense that they are failing to live up to that inclination leads them to feel embarrassed.”

Of course, people have slightly different viewpoints on what social scripts are and what sorts of behavior breaks them. So while it might seem innocuous to take the time to put away your change properly, most people in the U.S. would consider “not holding up a line” to be a social script — meaning,for the social situation of “standing in line” is “move quickly so as not to delay the other people in queue.

Dr. Feinberg says that in situations like opening gifts in front of a crowd, there are two scripts happening at once. One calls for you to open the gifts and demonstrate your gratitude. But another societal norm is to avoid being the center of attention for too long, which can explain some people’s self-consciousness about the tradition. “I don't think everyone will feel embarrassed. It likely depends on how much an individual focus is on one script or the other,” he notes.

If you don’t feel embarrassed about these situations, though, it probably doesn’t mean you’re bad or rude — just that you have a different understanding of social scripts, the situation you’re in, or the rules and norms of the society you’re currently in. The social scripts I’ve described are specific to the U.S.

MirelZee Enjoyed this. I would add menstrual periods, or the mere act of having menstrual hygiene in one's hand. I use to stuff pads in my socks or wear them like shoulder pads as a teen. WHY?!!

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