Hello everyone, it pains us to do this, but we have some really bad news. Mario’s longtime sidekick Toad died last night surrounded by his friends and family after a long battle with pancreatic cancer.
Obviously, this is a huge blow to the gaming community. Living in a world without Toad around is going to be an unbearable adjustment. With that said, we’ll get through this together. That’s all we have to say on the matter right now. Sorry about this, gamers. Sorry.
LETS FUCKING GOOOO
Damn it Toad! I told you this would happen!
Apolgy for bad english Where were u wen toad was die I was at home eating dorito then phone ring 'Toad is kil' 'No'
FAKE NEWS! FAKE NEWS! LOL!
WTH
Its about time that idiot is so obnoxious his npc always beat me in mario kart
maggiem413 omg
Does that mean he’s not coming on then?
finally
_The_Dark_lordd now hold up 😭😂
His last words before he died:
noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
And I got my car Towed on the same day Toad died! I Toed all the way to the funeral & realised it was a Blooper! It was Fawful!
Nah he just went to Minecraft
We4therMan 'bad'
finally
F
codyjnutt do you mean good
codyjnutt the worst thing to happen in 2020
GerardoLegend
Glooby_Oja sorry bro
GOD NOOOOO
gollyb_ Good problems
NOOOOOOOOOOO
I was sure the dead one was Trump weenie, ask Stormy, she knows!
Philly_RIOT hes wiv da angles now
shouldn't have been so close to the cliff with that heavy backpack, huh?
MARIOFANadam You gotta check this out.
Good riddance to bad rubbish
Good i hope he's actually dead for real this time
Finally
He was annoying asf on mario kart
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
NO T^T
The question on my mind. Why is a walking, talking mushroom called toad ?
ludraman_ Finally
It's a sad day
All the friends from my youth are leaving us 😢
Who do you think killed him?
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
You talk about Toad, but show a picture of Captain Toad instead, absolutely shameful, the disrespect
NO WTF
F
olivebrinker
coolsonickirby2 Fuck. 2020 whyyy
nooooo my best friend :(
Someone please insert a continue coin before the final countdown is over!!!
the highest quality shitposting
Good
Finally.
Oh thank god
Just so the rabbit didn't die!
Yay
BumpleNump NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
F
CHARLENE_1937
Good
Again?
Bitch finally expired
Toad is actually dead
RIP Toad
Finally
good
Sad to hear..he was a FUN GUY
I hope you published a follow up apologizing for not using his rank! CAPTAIN 👏TOAD 👏IS 👏A 👏TROOP and you will RESPECT that!
Again? Jesus toad
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
It's because micro dosing is legal is some states
good
F
Good
Shoulda been Mario
NO I LOVED TOADED
YEEEEES
not again...
good.
whimsicaltoad BAE OMG NO
NO
rip if only he was built different
How many times he gonna die according to y’all
:(
It's sad but he's been sick for a while so we all knew it was coming. He just kept such a brave face.
FOR A SEC I THOUGHT IT MEANT TOADS VOICE ACTOR
GarbageApe That's CAPTAIN Toad respectourtroops
Most people who knew him saw it coming
briangaar
Damn you, 2020! Damn you to helllllll!
Good.
Des_bugg
Man. Frick 2020 this year has went too far
Finally
The divide in reactions in the results is golden 😂
Shit
bruh why did i actually get concerned for a second
You say, Bad News. I say, About Time
I came here expecting to see that Toad died from something hilarious with yoshi and instead I read the article and... now I’m sad.. I’ll be praying for his family and friends as they get through this tumultuous time. 🙁
homeofsexuals This again? toadforamerica
Damn that sucks
Toad stans when they find out this isn’t actually real
another king meets an untimely demise. fuck cancer
How is this bad? It's sad is what it is...
First there was Lenin. Then Stalin. Then entered Toad. Thank you for your service comrade.
ElyseWillems 😢
2020 really is downhill
Toadette is next.
realDonaldTrump isn’t this your penis?!? Sorry it has died. Was it covid? RIP. StormyDaniels so sorry
FLY HIGH
NintendoAmerica is this true? 😰
ElyseWillems
TOO FAR
'''Bad''' news
so what you are saying is toadette is single
He got what he deserved.
Good...what a bitch
Good
Actually he’s alive and coming to Smash Ultimate as the next DLC fighter!
FilmCow how do you think the market will react to this news, poor Mario I don't think his heart can take this :(
another good person gone due to 2020's grasp
Met this lil dude in a bathroom once. He's packing larger than you'd think. RIP my man
Life isn't fair 😞
Mario RPGs are cancelled
Sorry, did you say 'bad' news?
jetsetfitz
That's Captain Toad.
Onion, don’t make me cry. TT_TT
Devastating...
'Bad'
Plot twist smh
ToadParody !!!!!!
luffy_taro RIP gone but never forgotten
This is razzadoop’s dream
Good
About time
wpenglander
F
Good
SaltQueenHD This can't be true!! 😭
First Chadwick Boseman, now this?
Good
finally
Babylonian what the fuck?!
Good.
Damn you 2020!
DirtySouthSoc
Shit that sucks he owed me $20 and some top
He is a pizza topping.
RIP King
WHAT
kittysonacid
Toad:
The Best can't die.
FINALLY
noooo
_bigjayy_ LMFAOOOOO WEAK ASS BOY
NOOOOOOOOO
Thank god he was so annoying
LET'S GOOOOOOOO
mike14353522 bro he was my favorite character in sonic
I think there's a misunderstanding
Wait... that’s good news
I’m actually playing the game right now
VillaGaming3 NO IM DEAD
NOT_Paper_Peach n I C E
SavedYouAClickV
NOOOO
literally fucking killing myself
WHAT
Hey onion, you know it’s not April fools day right?
heyitzscott _DeborahReilly
HUH WHAT
*sad BUP noises*
Good, I now have ingredients for my mushroom stew.
I read this just after finding a possible symptom of cancer on my body twitter whwt the fuck and how the fuck
Cookie__Sophie Why must 2020 take away good people? Why?
samthesly samthesly
Lol 😃
新蛤社
-1s
MelodicLemons2
The_BUP69 Toad, when i asked if that fake body was to fake your death, you said 'No'!
Good
So sad to hear! Toad is literally one of my favorite characters in Mario! RIP toad! My condolences to you and your family.
DINNER IS READY
HOLD UP JO IS TOAD CONFIRMED
GOOD
Only good news for Classic Paper Mario fans. I just wanna thank his murderer ✌
So Mario got the mushrooms 🍄 mixed up huh? Poor guy
Lol.
Paper Mario is saved
holy shit toad is fucking dead
No
just dont hurt koopa troopa
toad didnt kill himself
Now who will scream nonsense into my ears
looks like i'm out of a job
Finally
He will be sadly missed. His ability to pick vegetables at lightning speed made him a force, aside from Princess Toadstool’s ability to float long distances thanks to her parachute dress.
imercogo :'(
GamerAdachicool Damn.......
GamerAdachicool How’s that bad news?
F
Oh
Is it though?
NOOOOOOOOOOO
im so upset
so sad RIP
I thought he would outlive us all
In what possible way is this news even remotely bad?
How is that bad news?
No! Toad how could you die today!
MadameEtoile great news!
all of them?
He was reincarnated in the spaghetti tho 🤤
F
Awesome 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎
F
NOOOOOOOO
DerPiuus
is this why i saw him here
Ok
:( He was such a fun guy...
So? There are 100s of them
Huebi_LP Wir bruchen einen Trauerstream 😭😭😭😭😭
F
PvtCinnamonbun RIP TODD
sorola ElyseWillems
Damn :(
No No No
good
Is this even canon?
*good news
F
FUCK
roryisconfused RIP King
2020 can’t get more worse
GameOverGreggy
i wish this wasn't fake
GOD FUCK NO
He tried to take his 'hat' off only to end up taking off the top of his head.
Too far 😞
Good
Might be thousands of imposters
FizPriz_54 Uh oh
Imagining his eulogy delivered in Toad voice by other Toads.
Finally.
Bummer
Can 2020 get any worst before it ends? RIP
IllCaesarer 'Bad' news?
Finally The basterd deserved it
Good news
Shit.
sorola Kimmykimsieberg 😭
KevinTriforce
rip in peace toad
Where’s the bad part
HiMyNameIsRick9 Atwizz3r 😢😭
NOOOOOO :,( now he’s with Anthony
jujuonjuju
I got really sad for a second before reading “the onion”
Roccatex1 Shoot
Toadette is next
Haha thank you for staying relevant :v
Nice
good
what you mean bad news?
Damn. The Onion has to make stories based on video games, since reality is so fucked up it keeps stealing their material 🥴
its_quartz
Mane.... what..
oh fuck not every NPC in Paper Mario: Sticker Star for the Nintendo 3DS
RobbyB3ll4s ah shit...
2020 has gone too far
FloofyGabe
We must press f for respect
Again?
He's alive... and he's Fabulous.
FUUUUUUUCK NO
Noooooooo!!!!
You hate to see it
clopes989
GOOD news you mean
😭 My boy is gone way too soon
gretajacon this year continues to suck
Octomin1 bad news?
Damn.
Which pokemon is this
Philip Glass will be devastated.
mich_chartier sry for ur loss. My thoughts are with u during this time.
VitaminAxion 😢😢😢
sorola FUCK, NOT AGAIN
isnt this good news?
AdriOfTheDead How is this bad news? This is GREAT news!
Bad? How's this bad?
I killed him. Little shit couldn't tell me it was the wrong castle BEFORE I ENTERED?
Okay? And what's the bad news?
Todd173869 Good.
good.
Finally
Pour one out for the homie
But is he toadly dead?
ElyseWillems
sorola _jmarz_ good news
😭
Well, Toad’s gone. Good thing we’ve still got our good friends.....another Toad, and.....yep, you guessed it, a Toad.
Time to go through all of his tweets 😈
First of all how dare you, second how does a mushroom get pancreatic cancer? Someone get me a Mycologist.
WumpaGem Aight. I’m out. See y’all.
2020 just got crazier
SSoHPKC rip
But was he even really a toad? His life was a lie!
cake_hoarder
la_leere very misleading to announce the death of Toad and then use a picture of Captain Toad!
i fucking hate 2020
MaximusMarbles ?
RIP his chances of getting into smash bros
Let's Blue Shell Cancer
I want to believe this, but I feel like this troll is circled around why people suck at Captain Toad Treasure Tracker. Just saying.
You killed him
Oh nooooooooo my favourite guy
sorola F
Good
He is survived by his three children, Toad, Toad, and Toad
Good news*
sorola He didnt have another guy?
sorola lmao, I love all the people who don't know that The Onion is a satirical news site, and think this is true.
Sorry Zack
Oh no...
The Average life span of a toadstool is 7-10 days and does not drive a racing cart-kart. Toad had a long and interesting life for a toadstool, and may or may not be missed. Amen.
Read the article, the cancer did em in. Sad to hear it.
Finally
barkeep_
chrisbeaman
I don't know if this is a bad or good thing
BobWulff
Of Corona?
sorola Noooooooo!
cake_hoarder
Pumpman98
luffy_taro
Now whose suppose to guide me to the next level?
realsoulshakers Was it COVID19
He died like a true knight
Noooooo!! What mad man did this?!?
TOAD NOOOOOOO
he possessed me please help
TBH, I never liked the guy anyway.
Fuck noooooo
Which one? If the Toad in 1-4 died is the Toad in 2-4 okay? How about the Toad in 3-4 and...
There's, like, 200 different Toads Which one?
lordsturm473
RIP in peace
Fuck
ToadParody
SkeleySauce Ah shit.
And he was one day away from retirement 😢
Don’t go gently into the death - toadette
F
You really had to publish this on a Monday
This freak is a menace on mario kart hoarding all those red shells, toad won’t be missed
After Toad passed, Joe Rogan then ate him...
Toad is my favorite Nintendo character, so I would be very sad if Toad was killed off.
And I thought 2020 reached its peak.
😆😆
Man he was a Fungi
I hit the link so the Onion won’t go next
luulubuu
It was inevitable
ElyseWillems
no
LeesGames my boi
I just jacked him off, if that was his ghost wtf
Nah my man toad isn’t dead he is on life support tho
GameOverGreggy People are gonna blame 2020. Like years care about when someone dies.
GameOverGreggy His siblings will carry on the legacy. They are legion. You can't stop the Toad.
This is a lie. He has been secretly dead for years, just ask GamingHistorian
RealRGE ok and what are the bad news?
Is it really a bad news?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
😭😭😭😭😭
Cc SusaneHuong
Toadcube64
Fucking 2020.....
thedanclay sorry ☹️
Paper Mario fans rejoice
'Thank you for paying respects, Mario, but my funeral is in another castle.'
This should be good news.
Funny headline, unfunny article
I AM RIGHT HERE YOU FUCKING LIARS
Too soon!
Steeeefin
Sharktoothman11
Pain
Not Toad! He was the most memorable of them all behind Captain Toad, Blue Toad, Toad guards, Toadette, Mini Toad and Captain T. Ode.
NOOOO
With drums and guns, and guns and drums The enemy nearly slew ye; My darling dear, you look so queer, Och, Toad, I hardly knew ye.
Here's what they should play at his funeral
HBD willmenaker
So dose this mean he can’t be in anymore games or?
That ain't toad though. That's Captain toad. See even in death toad don't have the respect he always deserved.
So long, fucker
finally. this cretin is gone
rip Trump’s penis
cake_hoarder
Finally the evil has been defeated
NOOOOO
That’s Captain Toad. Not to mention there are a billion different Toads out there. For a satire site you think they’d do a little research.
Wtf
ToadParody
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! FUCK YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH
arijayofficial AlekswithaQuake
Oh no! I hate 2020.
here comes mushroom kingdom twitter🙄
G0ffThew F
YAMERO
jlfeelgood
theschwasound
Bout time that bastard died.
Which one of him?
Epic
my condolences to his family and friends
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
RealRGE Which one?
RealRGE YES
His final words, captured for posterity
Noooooo
They’re replaceable, they’re also all named Toads, so be specific...must be a confusing cemetery 🙃
2020 has no chill, wtf
LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Let's get RIPToad trending, ayy folks?
Chippy_NE f
So he’s not coming in Mario games anymore? Is he’s going to comeback?
Turns out he could eb cured but doctor Mario was in a different hospital.
dany_jacques :/
Who's going to drive my Kart?
How did this happen
Toadette won’t take this well
2020 has gone too far
Nativersal
haha
Which one of the 8 billion?
Sorry, but pretty sure Normogatari the GamingHistorian scooped y’all on this by over three years.
Warkris Is he okay?
No
I told the little guy to stop licking toads for fun 🥡🥢
HERESY
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
goodbye to a world (porter robinson)
Thank god put my man out of his misery
Good, he deserved it. Especially for tricking all of us in thinking that we saved the Princess in 1-4.
this year man
DAMN IT!
Nah he's just reinventing himself
Good
joeynoelle pettycommajared was definitely the culprit
NO
ToadParody Bad news dude.
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