At The Peak Of My Fame, I Could Have Slept With Any Werewolf, Mummy, Or Ghoul I Wanted

When you strike it big as a children’s author, your life changes dramatically. The money starts pouring in, and then there are the awards, the fans, the TV deals. For a few years there, I was the hottest thing in the business. It was a dizzying high, and you better believe I took advantage of all the perks the lifestyle had to offer. At my peak, back when I selling millions and millions of books, I could have slept with any monster I wanted—werewolf, mummy, ghoul, you name it.

On a book tour, temptation is never far away. Maybe you’re at a big children’s literature conference and you get recognized in the hotel bar. Pretty soon someone sends a drink your way, you look up, and a scantily clad zombie lurches toward you. Her cold, decaying breasts peak through a threadbare blouse that’s nearly falling off, and though you’re tired from the road, you know there’s nothing in this world quite like a zombie going down on you until her jaw falls off.

But overall, my regrets are very few, and if I could do it all again, I’d still eat out that Sasquatch in the bathroom of the Nashville Barnes & Noble.Eventually, I realized all this excess was taking me away from the thing I love most: writing spooky stories for kids. I didn’t want to wind up like Stephen King, who back then was picking up every telekinetic prom queen and rabid St. Bernard he could find, taking them to a haunted hotel in the mountains, and fucking for days on end.

I barely even see anyone from those crazy old days anymore. The only exceptions are the spawn from that pack of demonic she-wolfs with whom I fathered several litters of cursed, half-human creature-lings. I’m so proud of those kids.

RL_Stine I think he meant step-mummies for legal purposes

RL_Stine This Tweet gave me Goosebumps.

RL_Stine cc: anthonydimieri

RL_Stine Talk about ruining childhoods!

RL_Stine He's just part of the entourage of his brother: Francis.N.Stine.

RL_Stine Ok

United States Latest News, United States Headlines

Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.

Having Trouble Sleeping? Here's How to Know If You Should Call Your DoctorEveryone has nights when they simply can't fall asleep, but you should never ignore these symptoms.
Source: POPSUGAR Fitness - 🏆 401. / 53 Read more »

Twin Peaks Tease Unreleased Music in Video Diary, Will Release Something in Seven Days.TwinPeaksDudes tease forthcoming music in a new video diary:
Source: PasteMagazine - 🏆 392. / 55 Read more »

Denise Nickerson Of 'Willy Wonka' Fame Dead At 62The former child actress was immortalized in the 1971 film as the girl Violet, who turned into a blueberry. My condolences to her family her friends and fans
Source: YahooNews - 🏆 380. / 59 Read more »

9 deer at famed park in Japan die after eating plastic bagsNine deer at a famed park in western Japan have died recently after swallowing plastic bags. So sad 😔😔😔 Were they nickel or dime bags?
Source: ABC - 🏆 471. / 51 Read more »

Denise Welch reacts to Love Island newbie Chris Taylor's claim to fame - and it's hilarious!Loose Women panellist Denise Welch has broken her silence following Love Island newcomer Chris Taylor's claim to fame. Take a look here...
Source: hellomag - 🏆 24. / 68 Read more »

9 deer at famed park in Japan die after eating plastic bagsTOKYO (AP) — Nine deer at a famed park in western Japan have died recently after swallowing plastic bags. Nara Park has more than 1,000 deer, and tourists can feed them special sugar-free... 🙏 Humans are a scourge. :/
Source: AP - 🏆 728. / 51 Read more »