Ask Amy: A father ponders parental possibilities

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Dear Amy: I always felt that my daughter, “Carol” (from my first marriage) isn’t really “mine.”

I always felt that my daughter, “Carol” isn’t really “mine.”

A DNA test will be the proof and I am scared that this whole thing will be about a father that doesn’t want her I may freak out and find that after 50 years she was mine all along.How should I approach this?One way to begin would be to try your hardest to build a relationship with your daughter. If she seems unhappy “in a hidden way,” then you could start by reaching out to her, checking in, finding out a bit about her adult life, and connecting with her children and grandchildren.

I don’t think it’s wise to connect your daughter with her supposed reluctant biological father, or to share your specific suspicions with her. Let her draw her own conclusions and make her own choices.

 

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