Business, Workplace, Jobs, Our Annual Year 2014, Vol 50 Issue 42

Business, Workplace

Area Man Released After Being Wrongfully Employed For 9 Years

Area Man Released After Being Wrongfully Employed For 9 Years

10/23/2021 11:30:00 PM

Area Man Released After Being Wrongfully Employed For 9 Years

RICHMOND, VA—In response to mounting evidence showing that he never should have been in there in the first place, administrators at KDM Marketing officially released 34-year-old account manager Alex Olmstead today after nine years of being wrongfully employed. “After nearly a decade inside KDM’s sales division with…

Read more: The Onion »

American Music Awards 2021: The Full Winners List

The American Music Awards aired live from the Microsoft Theater in Los Angeles tonight at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC. Hosted by Cardi B, the star-studded awards show featured performances from BTS with Co…

I feel wrongfully employed but it’s all my fault. _I_ should be so lucky. I've been trying to get fired for two decades. 12 years - 6 years with blacklivesmatter 6 years of nuts are missing Mood Head of H.R. catches the almost decade long error, while biting into man's 9th year, red velvet, anniversary cake. Blood coloring simply put her in mood to fire someone.

Thanks to the Incompetence Project! Boss: There’s no way we can keep you on. Kramer: But I don’t even really work here! Boss: That’s what makes this so difficult. Phuckin HR, always mess things up...😖 Like to pastime? Is that Kevin from high school? I’m sure that’s Kevin.

Area Man Installs Home Pull-Up Bar To Absentmindedly Tap While Passing Through HallwayCHARLOTTE, NC—Saying it has already become a fixture in his daily routine, local 27-year-old Greg Weise installed a home pull-up bar to absentmindedly tap while passing through the hallway, sources confirmed Tuesday. “This bar just slips right over almost any doorframe, so it’s really easy to inattentively tap it when… *hang clothes off of Hey I do that, lol... Area Man is my favourite superhero

9 firms, no disclosures, no state licenses... Lucky bastard

Bay Area county fines burger chain over vaccine verificationCalifornia's popular In-N-Out hamburger chain is in trouble with yet another San Francisco Bay Area county over its failure to verify the vaccination cards of people choosing to dine-in with their double-doubles, shakes and fries. Why is this news? In-N-Out makes people fat and you all are complaining because one closed? United Plates of Americalories. California what else can you say lol! Keep it up In-N-Out!!

Former Broncos Head Coach Mike Shanahan Sells Denver-Area House for $15.725 MillionFormer Denver Broncos coach Mike Shanahan and his wife, Peggy Shanahan, have sold their Denver-area house for $15.725 million, making it the priciest single-family deal ever recorded in the area I would’ve bought it, but was looking for a 3 lane bowling alley and this house only had 2.

Man makes 'Tinder for dogs' after his senior pup had trouble finding playmatesColin Jarvis-Gaum also said that he started Pawmates due to Pal being a senior dog and needing to be at dog parks that were less lively. I was impressed by the professionalism of Mr Dereck0111 From the moment of my first free consultation,to the moment I got my profit,he's trustworthy,reliable and understanding... Dereck0111

Alabama again prepares to execute man after Supreme Court blocked it earlier this yearAfter the Supreme Court blocked an Alabama man's execution in February, the state is again preparing to execute him by lethal injection Thursday evening despite his lawyer's claims that he is intellectually disabled and has an IQ of 64.

Judge imposes harsher sentence than requested on man accused of encouraging U.S. Capitol riotersA judge on Thursday imposed a longer prison term than prosecutors requested on a Dallas man accused of posting inflammatory social media messages inciting people to violence at the U.S. Capitol on Jan. 6 even though he did not himself participate directly in the rioting. U.S. District Judge Tanya Chutkan sentenced Troy Smocks, 58, to 14 months incarceration and three years supervised release after he entered a guilty plea to a charge of making threats in interstate communication. Smocks, who is Black, told the judge that the Justice Department had treated him differently than white defendants who participated directly in the riot, which followed a speech by then-President Donald Trump, a Republican, at a nearby rally repeating his false claims that his election loss to Democrat Joe Biden was the result of widespread fraud. Thats a load of garbage I am in favor of black defendants like Smocks here being treated equally as the white insurrectionists, as he requests; I think each and every white defendant should be sentenced to a year-plus in prison, as Smocks has now been.