Are You Dealing With a 'Kind Narcissist'?

Sometime narcissism is more about quiet self-centeredness than grandiosity.

10/23/2021 5:38:00 AM

At first, the 'kind narcissist' seems like a generous, attentive person. The trouble arises once more is asked of them than they want to give.

Sometime narcissism is more about quiet self-centeredness than grandiosity.

who acts concerned about the welfare of an elderly parent while resisting any real contribution to that parent’s care. If you push back on this behavior, you’ll be met with wounded eyes, defensiveness, and an accusation that “No matter what I do, you’re never happy.”

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But where a kind narcissist is really exposed, unsurprisingly, is during long-term romantic partnerships. Especially after children. It’s hard to imagine a life experience better designed to put pressure on the system than having a baby. While the kind narcissist’s self-centeredness can often be masked in the beginning phases of a relationship or before there are any heavy responsibilities or tough times, eventually, the wheels come off.

Kind narcissists in relationshipsConsider Jack and Meredith, who came to me after Meredith told Jack she wanted to divorce. When they came to my office, Jack looked shaken and fearful—like he’d just emerged from a car wreck. Meredith was calm and poised and radiated a cool detachment. They’d been together for eight years and had two young children. headtopics.com

They’d met in graduate school, and Meredith had immediately been taken by Jack’s sunny, generous demeanor. “He always seemed like the first guy to jump in and help out. I thought he’d be an amazing partner. All everyone says about Jack is how nice he is, what a great dad, that I’m so lucky to have him. But it’s for show. He does exactly what he wants to do and doesn’t lift a finger otherwise. I’m exhausted, and I’m done.”

Two weeks earlier, Jack came home after spending the day playing baseball with friends. Meredith was in the kitchen making dinner, both kids at her feet. She asked Jack to take the kids while she finished up. Jack agreed but said he wanted to change his clothes first. Fifteen minutes later, he still hadn’t emerged.

Read more: Psychology Today »

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One more name given.Trying to categorise everything doesn’t make it closer to truth.The fact is everybody is a mixed up of everything.Different atmospheres and situations bring out certain traits.The sane and insane is a very thin line that human regularly cross back and forth.

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