5 Defensive Habits That Cut Off Communication And Creativity

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ore often than not, responses to questions—particularly those that may reflect on someone’s judgment, decisions, or intentions––come across as defensive. They’re meant to shut people down. For example, the following five defensive habits complicate, if not close down, a questioner.

Justifying

All but the clearly courageous colleague will drop their pursuit so as not to “become a pest” about the situation.Then there’s the dog-ate-my-homework response. They typically sound like this: “Actually, it was a committee decision.” Or: “That went above my paygrade. Just doing what I was told.” Or: “I was just following precedent.” Or: “They gave me old information.” Or, . . . well, you understand how this game goes.

“I don’t like to have my drafts reviewed until they are perfect. It’s almost finished. I’ll get the final to you in a couple of days.”The day before the proposal was due to the client, I stopped by Susan’s office and insisted on seeing a copy of her “almost finished” proposal. Reluctantly, she printed it off and delivered it to my office.

 

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