When Apple first promoted AirPods on TV in 2017, the ebullient image of Lil Buck dancing through a city was a direct reference to the whirling silhouettes of those early, iconic iPod commercials—only this time, the white earbud wires looked like they’d been snipped, leaving the dancer free from the tangle and, apparently, the confines of gravity. The same white pod shape of the earpiece, however, remained unmistakable. For years this design point opened AirPods up to plenty of mockery; critics supplied comparisons to sperm and insect pupae.
But it was this distinctive legibility—AirPods presented as something new, more or less in the shape of something familiar—that would eventually prove to be its greatest vector for evangelism once the slew of early adopters crossed into the realm of celebrities, professional athletes, and the street-style set. It quickly became impossible to look at a photograph of anyone wearing AirPods and not immediately recognize them as AirPods. From there the accessory’s function as visual shorthand for the rich and famous accelerated; by the launch of the second-gen and AirPods Pro versions in 2019, HBO’s Big Little Lies was using AirPods to delineate the power moms from Shailene Woodley’s less rich character (who wore regular ole wired ones—more on those in a sec). Later that year, in a poll of 100 teens, The Strategist found AirPods came second only to a phone in terms of items they couldn’t live without.
The third-generation AirPods, announced during Monday’s Apple event, clock in as a marginally improved, $179 Goldilocks option landing between the $129 second-gens and the mind-boggling $249 Pros. There’s a slate of medium-interesting features including something called “spatial audio”; the company insisted this feature is responsible for bringing one’s music to life “with sounds that surround you,” which did not quite land with this audio laywoman who is pretty sure that is how hearing generally works. But with AirPods reportedly accounting for 57% of the “high-end hearables” market, Apple knows it doesn’t need to reinvent anything here; upon review of existing AirPod options, you get the distinct feeling of perusing a wine list and being predictably tilted toward the second-tier Sauvignon that feels both pronounceable yet just superior enough to the house white, thanks to the cunning powers of consumer psychology.
Still, Apple’s glossy slideshow succeeded overall in making viewers acutely aware of our era of AirPod dominance—as Apple’s sleeper hit, millennial status symbol, and all-around wearable flex—since their debut five years ago. And even if you aren’t the type lured into keeping up with the Jobs-worshipping Joneses, the Q4 drop does provoke yet another decision on whether to (a) give in and finally get a pair, or, for those of us who’ve already caved, (b) covet a shinier, non-earwax-crusted version that seems capable of transforming you, finally, into the type of person who listens to Yo-Yo Ma at home or goes running in the rain.
But here’s an interesting twist: Now that the latest AirPods release proves they’re neither niche nor novel anymore, their power as a cultural object only stands to wane as the trend pendulum threatens to swing back. That means, for anyone who refuses to capitulate or who simply does not wish to pay for another pair of gentrifying white ear pupae, I have some great news: You now have a great excuse for opting out of AirPod mania, because now it can be considered a stylistic choice to opt out entirely and simply wear wired earbuds again instead.
I know. I know! Of course sources state that countless normal people have been simply doing that this whole time, but listen, Bella Hadid broke ’em back out in December 2019, and just last month, both Lily-Rose Depp and Dua Lipa were spotted out and about with the telltale cords dangling. You know what they say: Three items make a trend, but three It girl sightings just might portend an early death knell for AirPod nation. (In a way the enduring visual legibility of those white wired buds makes for a nice full circle moment for Apple; I suppose we’ll have to spend the next trend cycle figuring out how to shake Tim Cook’s chokehold entirely.)
But perhaps you prefer to take your style cues from the noncelebs: in that case, rest easy in knowing that wired earbuds have also been taking on a kind of cachet amongst the TikTok set, where runaway Y2K nostalgia has resulted in the existence of “wired earbuds aesthetic” and a vague antiestablishment vibe by association. Even if the idea of calling earbuds “vintage” makes you want to yank every premature gray out by the hair bulb, the great news is that you don’t have to be Gen Z to wish for simpler, pre-2016 times, and in that way, donning a pair of wired earbuds can be beautifully ahead of trend, exactly on trend, or delightfully anti-trend. Wherever you’re standing, it says something about you and your capacity for pure practicality. (N.B. Having switched to the wired version recently out of subway-related circumstances, I will vouch for the rediscovered pleasure of using the cord like a lure to fish one’s phone out from the caverns of one’s big-ass work bag instead of fumbling around arm-deep in its contents for, like, hours every day. The Hadid sisters and I share this problem, I bet.)
Where once AirPods were a statement themselves—mostly unto the condition of your disposable funds and surety of ear shape—they’ve become ubiquitous enough in the past five years that the tide has begun to turn. Meanwhile, the wired earbuds can be reread as an old-school, ironic choice, or at least a kind of statement against one tech company’s annual hype cycle. Really, the wired-earbud trend can be whatever you want it to be. And just imagine what you could do with all the time not spent obsessing over whether an expensive piece of technology is going to dislodge from your fragile head flap. Because let’s be honest: If they’re not AirPod Pros, they’re just not that exciting. And even if they are, everyone around you is mostly stressed—that is, not impressed—as they await their Pods’ inevitable tumble down the sewer grate.
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