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Entirety Of Objectionable Human Behavior Explained To Toddler As Person Acting Silly

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BATON ROUGE, LA—Noting the phrase’s ubiquity as an answer to almost every uncomfortable societal question, sources confirmed Monday that the full range of objectionable human behavior was explained to local toddler Oliver Jordan as a person acting silly. “Everything from mental illness to public drunkenness to a screaming match is waved away as someone just being a silly goose,” said observers, confirming that the same label was conferred on strangers, peers, and family members engaging in any remotely questionable activities. “Whether it’s someone sleeping in the park or begging for change, grandma saying something racist, or a murder on television, it can all be comfortably placed in the rubric of playing around and being a big goofball.” At press time, Jordan’s mother was explaining that his dad had been so silly for so long that they’d be moving to a different house.