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You can’t imagine how old and wretched I pictured this age when I first heard Paul McCartney’s song back in 1967. I still have about ten days to go, but can’t help comparing the lyrics then to the reality today…

When I get older losing my hair
Many years from now…

My husband Randy (also sixty-four) has full tresses that turned gray in his thirties, but of course, he looks distinguished. Thank God, I still have hair and because of Robin, my hairdresser, it’s a nice medium brown. So far, so good in the hair-losing department.

Will you still be sending me a Valentine
Birthday greetings bottle of wine

Every Valentine’s Day and birthday, for over forty years, Randy has given me a beautiful bouquet of flowers, usually red or pink roses. Because my husband never does anything halfway, sometimes two or three bunches. As for wine, anyone who knows us is chuckling right now. Wine procurement in the Stone house is not a problem.

If I’d been out till quarter to three
Would you lock the door

My musician husband has seen many a wee hour. As for me? I haven’t been outside at quarter to three since I was twenty-five. In fact, if you see me outside your door at quarter to three, it means I’ve gone mad, and by all means, lock up.

Will you still need me, will you still feed me
When I’m sixty-four

I’m not an ambitious cook but have fed Randy in my own utilitarian way over the years. And yes, I still need that guy who drove me in his mustard-colored 1976 Mercury Capri along the Connecticut coast between college classes. We’d sing along to the Beatles, including this song, shaking our heads at the doddering, old couple it portrayed.

You’ll be older too
And if you say the word
I could stay with you

Of course, we had no idea we’d be that doddering, old couple. He was the tall, funny guy that held court in the university snack bar. I was the smart-ass English major he was always debating.

But here we are, four decades later. Along the way, we raised two little boys who are now two bearded young men. We still debate, hug, plan, talk, work, kiss, squabble, laugh, sleep with each other each night, wake up next to each other each morning, and try and navigate this sometimes-hard, sometimes-wonderful life together.

I could be handy, mending a fuse
When your lights have gone

Ahem, (*cough*) my husband has many talents, but handyman stuff is not one of them.

You can knit a sweater by the fireside

I couldn’t knit anything bigger than a postage stamp.

Sunday mornings go for a ride

Where’s the nearest ice cream shop?

Doing the garden, digging the weeds
Again, hard pass.

Who could ask for more?

What you don’t realize when you’re young is how beautiful most of life is, how precious, how you grow to cherish each day. Many of us get to a point where we truly couldn’t ask for more. Gratitude is all we feel. So happy I’m in that club.

Every summer we can rent a cottage
In the Isle of Wight, if it’s not too dear

Isle of Wight’s a bit far, but we’ve managed to rent a cottage on Cape Cod each summer.

We shall scrimp and save

Randy’s first car was a blue Ford LTD. Each morning, he had to open the hood and spray ether into the carburetor to get it going. We scrimped and saved over the years, and I’m proud to say, we now have two cars that start without having to open the hood.

Grandchildren on your knee
Vera, Chuck and Dave

Not quite there, but you never know.

Send me a postcard, drop me a line
Stating point of view
Indicate precisely what you mean to say
Yours sincerely, wasting away

Indicating precisely what we mean to say has never been a problem for Randy and me. In fact, we’ve learned over the years to not say precisely what we mean to say, at times. It’s easier and kinder and has saved on lawyer bills.

Give me your answer, fill in a form
Mine for evermore
Will you still need me, will you still feed me
When I’m sixty-four

Sometimes I want to visit those know-it-all college kids and say, see? We’re not those doddering, miserable old wretches after all. (I think). Life is good, but goddamn, it goes fast. It’s also scary and difficult and sad, sometimes.

But it’s always worth living. And there’s still lessons to learn and joy to be had.

You won’t believe it, kids, but life isn’t so bad when you’re 64.

 

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Comments(14)

  1. Well, I might not be 64 but not being able to wear reading glasses, it is very hard to write in this box!
    I am still in in my early 50’s (‘still’ as if I can hang onto it in some way!) but my lovely husband is 65! I like the bit about gratitude. I have always been a bit of a glass half empty person when it comes to relationships. But I am slowly becoming a glass half full one! You never know, by the time I am 64, the glass might be brimming over! 😉

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Jennie, You won’t believe how grateful we get as we get older and that runway gets shorter. Every day becomes a blessing.

  2. oh, this was a favorite of mine. I must run the lyrics by Loved-One. He’ll be 64 his next birthday. In the review mirror for me.

    Loved this reminiscing.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Adela, Thanks so much. My 85 year old mom keeps telling me how young 64 is. Perspective is everything.

  3. I am so excited that in two weeks, 9/20 to be exact, I will be celebrating my 59th birthday – God willing!!!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Antoinette, The fifties are a great decade, but so are the sixties. My birthday is on 9/23 so we’re both getting there. God willing, as you say!

  4. This truly is the best time of all! I never would have thought that back when I was 17 and listening to this song.
    I’ve only got a couple of weeks before I move on to the next step…65! Wish me luck!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Diane, I wish you the best of luck! I’m beginning to think the sixties are an older adolescence, full of exploration and, at times, fun.

    • Mer

    • 4 years ago

    Happy early 64th birthday!
    I always loved the song and ages ago thought 64 was really, really old. No more.
    Been there and still going strong, sort of, most days…

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Meryl, Sounds like you’re doing great! Yes, age is relative, after all.

  5. This post was so beautiful. I have a few years befre I a,m 64 but the sentiment still works at my age. Also, I can’t see as well as I used to and driving at night suddenly scares me a bit. Here we go. It’s a bumpy ride.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Lauren, I’ve learned every age has its challenges and beauty.

    • Robert Emmett Ruane

    • 4 years ago

    I am in the twilight of my 50s (I enjoyed your piece about being in one’s 50s–you were my current age, 59, when you wrote it). I will be 64 (eight squared0 in a mere four and a half years, and I am sure that family and friends will be playing that song in my honor in 2025. My girlfriend is only 20 months away from eight squared.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Robert, Sounds like you can relate! Thank you for reading.

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