Let’s move to Helmsley, North Yorkshire: super sweet and picture perfect

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The town is straight off a box of fudge, all honeyed stone and pansies waving from prize-winning baskets

What’s going for it? Helmsley’s so sweet I can feel the cavities forming in my teeth from 10 miles away. The town is straight off a box of fudge, all honeyed stone and pansies waving from prize-winning hanging baskets. Utterly delicious, with its Norman castle, Palladian pile, secret garden and streets of rigorously renovated and scrupulously scrubbed 18th-century cottages. Just not very good for the waistline.

 

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Don't blight Yorkshire, stay in your Islington bubble.

Oh, it is bloody boring though: just thronged with bikers having a meet and tearoom visitors .

I may be wrong, but I think they burn you if you’re not a tory.

While on a visit, I parked overnight on a residential road only to find a note the following day asking me not to park there

Given it’s the shooting centre of the universe I’m sure the almond milk slurping 🥑munching champagne socialist guardianistas will fit in really well.....

If you like this, you'll love Poundbury.

Only if you can work remotely

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