If Your Sexual Partner Keeps Quiet About Sleeping With Other People, Is It A Violation Of Consent?

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“We sat in silence for a few moments. ‘I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure when would be the right time to tell you,’ he said. ‘Before we started sleeping together, perhaps?’ I thought.”

We finally did the deed a few days’ later . Over the next month, we saw each other a couple of times a week and messaged most days. We told each other what we’d been up to when we’d been apart, and references to “my friend” were soon exchanged for names, back stories and photos for context. We were enjoying each other’s company and getting closer. We’d laid our cards on the table, or so I thought.

Then one Sunday morning we were at Alfie’s flat. He’d suggested making pancakes for breakfast, then driving to the coast. It was too hot to stay in London. But after breakfast, he dropped a bombshell. We were sat on the sofa, his arm around me. “So, there’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about,” he said, straightening up. “I think we need to talk about us and where things are going.”“I’m still not sure I’m ready for a relationship, and I don’t want to mess you around,” he said.

“No, it’s not that, I just don’t want to keep you waiting,” he said. Still unsure of what was at the crux of this, I tried: “Is it that you want to date other people?”I was shocked and confused. Was this a new development? When had he found the time? Which of his evenings supposedly spent with colleagues, with friends, or on the sofa had actually been with her?“How often do you see each other?”We sat in silence for a few moments. “I’m sorry.

 

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