Co-parenting: what, who, why and how?

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It’s a term we hear a lot, but would you know where to begin? We ask a legal expert and a real-life mum how to co-parent effectively.

Learning how to parent alongside your partner is all part and parcel of having a child. When we first become parents not many of us ever consider how we’d bring up our children between two separate households. But that is the reality for plenty of parents, who have to learn how to put in to practice a functioning co-parenting relationship, while for others, co-parenting has always been the plan.

“Some people find a set routine is the only option, so everyone can plan ahead, the need for communication is kept to a minimum and there is limited scope for dispute. Whilst this can have positives it can also mean that children miss out for example if there is a specific social event or trip that falls within the ‘other parent’s’ time. The court will usually expect parents to exhibit appropriate levels of flexibility but requests for changes should be done as far in advance as possible.

For us, it has worked best to agree everything between ourselves, and we've both been fully committed to what has been agreed – whether that's financial or logistical arrangements. The benefit of an informal arrangement like this is that we can review and change arrangements at any time. We actually plan in who our daughter will be staying with months in advance and have a shared calendar app to do this.

 

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