' Boris Johnson always wanted to be like Churchill - he may also cause blackouts'
Anything from a farm will be in short supply, because of energy prices but also because there’s a labour shortage. This has turned out well as one argument for Brexit was so we could have more space in our country
We’ll serenely form a nine-mile queue outside every petrol garage and scream “MUST HAVE PETROL” while hyper-ventilating and howling like a hyena under the moonlight.Millions of people will shout “WHERE DID YOU GET YOUR PETROL?” at everyone they see who’s driving, including hearses, ambulances and hovercraft. If you tell them you don’t have a car, they’ll scream “WHAT?”, then: “WHERE DO YOU KEEP YOUR PETROL?”
People will arrive at petrol garages with buckets, cake tins, cat litter trays, anything that can hold a bit more petrol.Others will scream: “Empty the baby’s milk bottles, we can use them to store more petrol.” Meanwhile ministers appear on television every day to assure us we won’t run out of energy.
And you can see on their face they’re thinking: “AAAAAAAGH WE’RE GOING TO RUN OUT OF ENERGY.”For years they told us the answer to energy prices hurtling upwards is to “shop around” for the cheapest deal.So when it costs £4,000 worth of gas to heat up a pan of custard, it’s YOUR fault for not swapping to a Ukrainian company that was a bit cheaper until half past five when it went into liquidation and turned out to be owned by a cousin of Jacob Rees-Mogg. headtopics.com
Maybe the Government should answer other problems in this way. If they’re asked what they’re doing about knife crime, they can say: “My advice is to shop around for areas where you’re less likely to get stabbed.”Luckily the Government has planned these shortages carefully. So we’re running out of food at the same time, which means it doesn’t matter if there’s no fuel for lorries or drivers to drive them, as there’s nothing for them to take.
Anything from a farm will be in short supply, because of energy prices but also because there’s a labour shortage.This has turned out well, because one argument for Brexit was so we could have more space in our overcrowded country. And now we have! A few years ago, the shops were packed full of food and clothes but now there’s plenty of room along the shelves so there’s no problem of where to put things.
Boris Johnson always wanted to be like his hero Churchill and he might get his wish.Because just like in 1942, by December we’ll all be growing turnips in the wardrobe. And buying a chicken on the black market off a bloke behind the bus shelter.And we won’t need the Luftwaffe as an excuse for a blackout.
We’ll have blackouts because if you turn on the bedside light for 10 minutes you’ll get an electricity bill for £900.In 2015 David Cameron warned we faced “stability with the Conservatives, or chaos with Ed Miliband”.When we’re hunting berries and cooking pets, we should all be thankful we didn’t vote for chaos. headtopics.com
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'Always wanted', without a war, he always will ! Oh no is he going to give poland to the russians 🇬🇧😨 Hey, ENGLAND: You had Truck Drivers, but they were Ukrainians, Poles, Latvians, Russians, Slovaks, Bosnians, Romanians and Serbs! We worked hard, but You told us: Racists, get out! O.K.! Karma is free for arrogant England 👏😈 panicbuying GreatBritain BorisJohnson
Well he’s blown that ! What is missing for the country to understand that Brexit was a mistake? Will they continue to believe the lies? While the government invests in aircraft carriers. He wants grow some bollocks and make decisions, be them right or wrong in the end. Leaders make decisions and when wrong admit it, fix it move on. I guess that’s to much to ask of our politicians though😏
Boris Johnson admits tunnel to Northern Ireland ‘not the most immediate’ ambition Boris Johnson has indicated that his long-held hopes of building a tunnel connecting Northern Ireland to Scotland have been abandoned for now after Treasury pushback. Oh FFS hasn't he dropped that stupid idea yet? I do hope the country isn't still wasting millions on pointless, fruitless logistics exercises, like London did with his daft garden bridge or estuary airport.
Boris Johnson and Macron speak after military pact rowUK and France will work together despite a diplomatic spat over Australian submarines, Downing Street says. That is not what was said. Nothing was agreed. Why do you repeat Johnson's lies?
Boris Johnson relaxes rules for foreign lorry drivers🔴 NEW: Boris Johnson is set to relax immigration rules for European lorry drivers as queues began to form at petrol stations following warnings of fuel rationing Again more scaremongering.its got to stop .the only problem is panic buying because of story like this So after all we need them more than they need us. 😜 Where’s the Torygraph outrage? Irony and hypocrisy clearly lost on your propaganda rag.
Boris Johnson has '10 days to save Christmas' amid lorry driver shortage chaosSome petrol pumps up and down the land ran dry as motorists started panic buying at the forecourts. And retail chiefs warned Boris Johnson has 10 days to save Christmas most EU countries have HGV driver shortages also.
Beware, Boris: when you annoy drivers, you risk losing your electoral base⛽ 'People expect petrol supplies to be plentiful and accessible at all times, and if they’re not, they will resort to the ballot box' | Writes MrTCHarris
Sorry Boris, but Kermit the Frog was right – it's not easy being green'High energy prices are not going to be temporary. As in the 1970s, they may end up as one of the primary drivers of a wider inflationary shock' 그리스도의 신부는 그리스도의 거룩하심이라는 정체성과 이미지를 갖고 있습니다 AnnouncementOfRapture BeHoly Really That's such a surprise this Govt are screwing us over with everybody goingu up in price...but absolutely nothing to do with brexit.