Why do girls love walking red flags?

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Uh, no, girl. You can't fix him. | via philstarlife

This isn’t to say that there haven’t been any success stories in the field. Bad boys are capable of experiencing a change of heart, even when they don’t seem to have one to begin with. They may just be victims of toxic environments, unresolved trauma, or even faulty first impressions. When Clari and her boyfriend first started out, she was sure they wouldn’t last. “He was this alpha male type from an all-boys school, who smoked and rode a motorcycle,” she recalls.

Sadly, while we like to think that love is this unconditional, all-encompassing force that can save everybody, it’s probably not. Change is only temporary if catalyzed by fickle emotion; a real shift in attitude is something of one’s own volition. If he’s a master manipulator who continues to inflict emotional abuse without a hint of remorse, he doesn’t need our support, patience or understanding; he needs cognitive behavioral therapy.

Bad boys are capable of experiencing a change of heart, even when they don’t seem to have one to begin with. “I feel like every girl should go through a boy that will break her heart in order for her to learn,” Sage shares. “It’s hard to distinguish infatuation from love, then love from manipulation, especially if you don’t have any point for comparison.” Her advice? Date around. “Don’t settle at once because chances are you might not be aware of how you’re being treated. Once you have enough experience, then you’ll be able to distinguish if someone’s intentions are genuine or if they’re just all talk.

It’s a learning process, this fickle thing called romance. Sometimes, it doesn’t make sense why we had to cross paths with certain people. But rest assured, the partners we meet, love, and leave all form part of who we are, what we think of ourselves, and what we know we deserve. While the bad boys we let into our lives are likely not our happy endings, at least our experiences with them sure make for one hell of a good story.

 

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philstarlife Maybe because that's how society raised us. It's like when your father gets home drunk and starts beating your mother, the latter would often tell you 'it's okay, he loves me. He'll change.' we don't view things as they are. Sadly, we tend to view them as how we want them to be.

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