Miss Manners: I’m having a party but I want to keep everyone out of the house

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Miss Manners: I’m having a party but I want to keep everyone out of the house
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Advice from Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin.

: My husband and I are having an outdoor cocktail party. Since it is outdoors, would it be acceptable to have people enter through our yard gate instead of going through the house, then into the yard?

I tend to be a very private person; I do not enjoy taking people on tours of my home, nor do I ask others to give me a tour of theirs. In the past, I have found people roaming through my house and trying to open various doors. But having people direct your guests away from the house is a good idea, as are signs in case those people have to leave their posts. As for what to say when asked for a tour? “We are just enjoying the outdoors today.”: My husband just doesn’t understand why I do not wish to hang out with his new work friend and the friend’s wife. I have expressed my reasons and told him I could not tolerate them more than once a month.

My husband says “that’s just her.” I told him that I wouldn’t want someone to talk to me like that, and I asked if he’d like for me to talk to him like that, to which he said no. He said it doesn’t bother his friend, to which I asked if he had actually asked his friend that question.

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