This week, I descended briefly into hell; specifically, swimsuit shopping hell; even more specifically, a brightly lit department store lined with racks of teeny bathers that would barely cover my bum or leave me change from $200.iStock
I used to enjoy swimsuit shopping, back in the previous century when I hadn’t yet birthed three babies, or acquired a post-C-section “pouch”, or suffered from an unpleasant condition known as “pelvic vein congestion”. I could walk into a store and throw on some skimpy bikini, and it would cost a few dollars, and I would prance out to the beach.by my swimsuit. I don’t want the only thing between me and nudity to be three tiny triangles held together with string.
I tried browsing online, but you need to try on swimwear to determine how it will look and feel. So off I trudged to shops filled with itsy bitsy-bikinis that would look fabulous on my daughters but were way too flimsy for me.The one-pieces were substantial, but they were all completely wrong. Either they had no breast support, so my boobs hung limply beneath the spandex, or they had huge built-in cups that gave off Barbarella vibes.
Still, I pushed on. I spent hours under harsh change-room lights that screamed “Buy fake tan!” and “Do sit-ups!” and “Get some more sleep!” I tried on tops that made me look completely flat, and tops with cups that my poor little boobs swam in . I tried on matronly bottoms that came up past my navel, and a pair of tiny briefs that left my cheeks on full display.
We have summarized this news so that you can read it quickly. If you are interested in the news, you can read the full text here. Read more:
Australia Latest News, Australia Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
Bikini shopping after three kids is an itsy bitsy dive into hellOpinion: Bikini shopping after three kids is an itsy bitsy dive into hell | Kerri Sackville Tell me you're kidding? This is not real! I’d love to find something similar too as most swimsuits 🩱 are not suitable Time to grow up as you grow out.... welcome to the real world
Source: smh - 🏆 6. / 80 Read more »
Victorian Labor is running a ‘positive, optimistic campaign’ in lead up to state electionVictorian Premier Daniel Andrews says Labor is running a positive, optimistic campaign that’s about everyone in the state. “I will leave the commentary and the opinion pieces and frankly the negativity to you,” Mr Andrews said during a media conference on Friday. “Look seriously, this is about a positive plan to cut the cost of living, not cut people’s jobs as the Liberal Party want to do.” It comes a day out from the state election when Victorians will head to the polls on Saturday to vote for their next premier. Except Christian’s Never knew he had such a great sense of humour but we're still going to PutLaborLast What about the unvaxed? Give your opinion on them, Andrews.
Source: SkyNewsAust - 🏆 7. / 78 Read more »
Social media Foreign Interference Committee re-established to prevent overseas ‘influence’A Senate Committee examining the dangers of Foreign Interference through social media will be re-established after it lapsed at the end of the last parliament. Shadow Cyber Security Minister James Paterson says on western headquartered social media platforms, authoritarian states seek to “influence our democracy” and ultimately the decisions that we make as sovereign countries and our elections. “By pumping our system full of false information, deliberately false information to try and mislead voters and mislead the public and shape our public opinion and debate. “This should not be allowed to happen, it is toxic and corrosive to our democratic institutions and our strength as a liberal democracy.' Our own corrupt CCP controlled government is far more concerning than any foreign media. Maybe they can reveal why Fakebook, YouTube and Twitter have been censoring the truth for the past couple of years? But then again, that would just reveal the filthy level of corruption.
Source: SkyNewsAust - 🏆 7. / 78 Read more »
From drought to flood in three years, the NSW landscape is almost unrecognisableThe flooded landscape across the Central West paints a very different picture to that of three years ago when Australia was suffering a record-breaking drought.
Source: smh - 🏆 6. / 80 Read more »
Coming soon: Gimlet restaurant is opening a hidden cocktail bar three doors down on Flinders LaneThe team behind one of Melbourne’s most buzzing restaurants is giving fans another way to enjoy their hospitality – and on a much more intimate scale.
Source: theage - 🏆 8. / 77 Read more »
Three Canberrans among six people arrested in NSW drug bustPolice say the total estimated street value of the MDMA and cocaine seized throughout the investigation is more than $750,000. Does include pm aNd his. Untrustworthy cabinet or big Pharma drug pushers lobbying govt. For greater control especially when The Pfizer and other shots pushed Are drug syndicates the only users of hundred dollar notes?
Source: abcnews - 🏆 5. / 83 Read more »